This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

Twas the night before Christmas — Babble style

‘Twas the month before Christmas and what did I see

But a list from Babble labeled “Top” Mommy

Top Mommy Bloggers but where was my name?

It wasn’t even listed, that seemed quite lame.


Perhaps I’m not known as a blogger type Mom

But I do have some kids, aka as “spawn”

And I bitch and I moan about them quite often

So is it my tone, perhaps it should soften?


Do they not like the cursing, the “shits” and the “fucks?”

Because then I do think that I’m “shit out of luck.”

What does it take to make this “Top Mom’s list?”

Is there some sort of handbook to give me the gist?


Should I write about homework and soccer and food?

But what about the fact that I’m never in the mood

To discuss all this crap that other moms do

To me it’s the funny stuff, that’s all I knew.


Anyone can talk about kids and their rearing

I think there’s something about my kind of cheering

Putting up with the crap, being honest and frank

Admitting you suck and your kids sometimes tank.


That they annoy you; you hate them

They make you quite mad

But at the end of the day

Living without them is sad


So you bitch and you whine and make fun of them too

But isn’t that love in a different way too?

And shouldn’t the voices be different and proud

A list full of spices that don’t blend in with the crowd?


That’s what I think and I’m here to say

I’m not going anywhere; I’m here to stay

With my crappy grammar and bad English too

And pointless stories of my family and crew



I shall carry on and blog about stuff that I wanna

Whether it be my kids or pets or some fauna

This eclectic mix is here to stay

And nobody will ever tell me what to say



So I’m not on the list; I’m not a top blog

I’m just one person and I’ll continue to slog

I may be Fooked Up but aren’t you too?

Isn’t everyone I mean, in 1 way or 2?


So join me here each and every weekday

I’ll write my fun stories and we’ll continue to play

Fuck all the mom lists, the proper ones too

After all, I’ve been there and trust me it BLEW!

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  1. meeeee again
    December 12, 2012

    bahahahahaaa yes!!!

  2. Nana
    December 12, 2012

    Now this is why I love to read you! Love it!

  3. Marilynn
    December 12, 2012

    Oops! Typo or damn autocorrect. Second verse, third line. Keep up the good work. I enjoy your blog.

  4. Mayor Gia
    December 12, 2012

    Ooo a poem! Very nice! Honestly, I’m not really sure what Babble even is, but I can tell that you do not care for them. heh
    Mayor Gia recently posted..12 Days of Christmas: FiveMy Profile

  5. Julie
    December 12, 2012

    I bow to you.

  6. Susan
    December 12, 2012

    Go Lynn! Thanks for continuing to give us your perspective-it’s closer to mine than a more traditional view would be!

  7. Janet
    December 12, 2012


  8. Tammy Kelly
    December 12, 2012

    HAHAHA! I love this and your blog!

  9. Sheri
    December 12, 2012

    I don’t have children. I read your blog because it’s funny. I don’t read Mom blogs. I can only take so much advice on changing diapers and getting kids to eat. Actually, I have a zero-tolerance policy for people who find their kids perfect. I’ve had to divorce several cousins because of this policy.

  10. Lauren
    December 12, 2012


  11. Kelly
    December 12, 2012

    Brilliant!!!! I love it. You are in my favorite blog list :)

  12. Elizabeth
    December 12, 2012


  13. Amy
    December 12, 2012

    I love this! Gonna share, typos and all!

  14. Brigett C
    December 12, 2012

    Lmao….Dr suess ain’t got nuttin on you sistah….too funny!

  15. Robin
    December 13, 2012

    Nice job!

  16. Annabelle
    December 13, 2012

    Ha! Love it.

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