This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!
Twas the night before Christmas — Babble style
‘Twas the month before Christmas and what did I see
But a list from Babble labeled “Top” Mommy
Top Mommy Bloggers but where was my name?
It wasn’t even listed, that seemed quite lame.
Perhaps I’m not known as a blogger type Mom
But I do have some kids, aka as “spawn”
And I bitch and I moan about them quite often
So is it my tone, perhaps it should soften?
Do they not like the cursing, the “shits” and the “fucks?”
Because then I do think that I’m “shit out of luck.”
What does it take to make this “Top Mom’s list?”
Is there some sort of handbook to give me the gist?
Should I write about homework and soccer and food?
But what about the fact that I’m never in the mood
To discuss all this crap that other moms do
To me it’s the funny stuff, that’s all I knew.
Anyone can talk about kids and their rearing
I think there’s something about my kind of cheering
Putting up with the crap, being honest and frank
Admitting you suck and your kids sometimes tank.
That they annoy you; you hate them
They make you quite mad
But at the end of the day
Living without them is sad
So you bitch and you whine and make fun of them too
But isn’t that love in a different way too?
And shouldn’t the voices be different and proud
A list full of spices that don’t blend in with the crowd?
That’s what I think and I’m here to say
I’m not going anywhere; I’m here to stay
With my crappy grammar and bad English too
And pointless stories of my family and crew
I shall carry on and blog about stuff that I wanna
Whether it be my kids or pets or some fauna
This eclectic mix is here to stay
And nobody will ever tell me what to say
So I’m not on the list; I’m not a top blog
I’m just one person and I’ll continue to slog
I may be Fooked Up but aren’t you too?
Isn’t everyone I mean, in 1 way or 2?
So join me here each and every weekday
I’ll write my fun stories and we’ll continue to play
Fuck all the mom lists, the proper ones too
After all, I’ve been there and trust me it BLEW!
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bahahahahaaa yes!!!
Now this is why I love to read you! Love it!
Oops! Typo or damn autocorrect. Second verse, third line. Keep up the good work. I enjoy your blog.
Ooo a poem! Very nice! Honestly, I’m not really sure what Babble even is, but I can tell that you do not care for them. heh
Mayor Gia recently posted..12 Days of Christmas: Five
I bow to you.
Go Lynn! Thanks for continuing to give us your perspective-it’s closer to mine than a more traditional view would be!
BRAVO!!!!
HAHAHA! I love this and your blog!
I don’t have children. I read your blog because it’s funny. I don’t read Mom blogs. I can only take so much advice on changing diapers and getting kids to eat. Actually, I have a zero-tolerance policy for people who find their kids perfect. I’ve had to divorce several cousins because of this policy.
Fantastic!!!!
Brilliant!!!! I love it. You are in my favorite blog list :)
AWESOME!!!!!
I love this! Gonna share, typos and all!
Lmao….Dr suess ain’t got nuttin on you sistah….too funny!
Nice job!
Ha! Love it.