This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

Go ahead, amuse me Tracey

Today’s guest on Go ahead, amuse me is Tracy and heres her intro:

Hey there, I’m Tracy, a Canadian girl with a quirky take on life. I’ve been married for about a hundred years and I am launching two teenagers. I began blogging recently after sharing stories with several friends about the seniors condo I work in. They encouraged me to write a book, however I am far too lazy for that. Shortly after starting the blog, I was asked to write a humour column for our local newspaper. I write about whatever strikes me funny.  It’s all about cracking myself up!  Stop by the blog if you get a chance at http://tracytakesthecake.blogspot.ca/

Thank you, Lynn, for having me as a guest!

Pinterest and Facebook and Twitter, Oh My!

I sure have ‘met’ a lot of new friends lately!  I have to admit, I’m loving it. I hear people clucking all the time about the loss of our ability to socialize face to face.  They lament about their teenagers who always have their faces buried in some electronic device and never talk to their grandparents anymore.  For the love of God, as if they ever did!  Teenagers are anti-social creatures who dwell in your basement. Unless you live in the mall, look like the cast of Twilight or drape yourself in snack foods, they don’t want to come near you. It’s a fact, they pass through it, don’t take it personally.  More on teenagers later….

Back to social media, I’m a bit torn.  On the one hand, I entirely agree that people of all ages say things in message form that they would never dream of saying face to face.  And do they truly mean the things they say?  (LOVE YOU SO MUCH BABY GIRL!!!) *barfy emoticon* Really, do you really love her?  You met outside a fitting room at The Gap and became Facebook friends…

Perhaps social skills are on the wane.  I mean, you don’t ever want to lose that ability to converse in human form. For example, you might need to ask someone for their awesome cheeseball recipe at a potluck. (I can only think of examples that involve food. Really, why else would you actually leave your house and try to relate to someone else?)  And you need to teach your kids how to conduct themselves in the big bad real world. A text to your boss saying, ‘Srry Im L8’ just won’t cut it.

However, being the socially awkward and highly annoyable person I am, email and social media work wonders in my life.  They allow me to relate to people while avoiding them all at the same time!   I’m sure it’s just my questionable personality, but having a face-to-face conversation with certain people is like having a root canal…and a bikini wax….at the same time.
Oh don’t look so smug….you all know the people you’d like to avoid.  Can’t think of any?  Let me share my list with you:

Nancy Namesayer – Yes, we can thank the abundance of “How to Network” books for the people who believe they have to use your name 12 times in a sentence.  “Well, you see Tracy, our industry is just the best place to be because, Tracy, you know we’re just going great guns right now!! Tracy, I think you’d really enjoy what we have to offer.”  Thank God you came along, Nancy, because for a minute there I actually forgot who the hell I was, Nancy.

ADD Andrew – Andy can’t be bothered to wait for your answer, he asks you a question then answers it for you. “You want a coffee? Oh, no you probably just had a coffee, I guess we all have to stop drinking so much coffee. Is it snowing out?? I have new shoes!!!!”   He is also guilty of asking a question then taking off, leaving you answering your own sweet self. Yoohoo! Andy??

TMI Tammy – We get waaay more information than we need from Tammy.  “Well you know dear, ever since the surgery, I just haven’t been as regular as I want to be. You knew I have the diverticulitis, eh?  I can’t have peanuts or anything like that. My bowel just can’t handle it.”  Woah…that’s quite enough, Tammy!

Halitosis Harold – Self explanatory. The equivalent of talking to a dog in great need of a minty Milkbone. It’s really too bad that it’s socially unacceptable to plug your nose while conversing with someone.  A tictac wouldn’t kill ya, Harry…

Personal Space Polly – A close relative of Halitosis Harold, Polly is not aware of the physical boundaries that should separate the two of you. (my requirements for personal space are ambitious).  You take a step backward; Polly takes a step forward.  Soon, you are backed against the wall with your eye on the emergency exit.  Back away Polly, ‘fore I bust out the ninja moves.

Recognize any of these characters?   If not, I bet they are coming soon to a conversation near you!

Believe it or not, I actually love socializing with family and good friends (as long as there’s food).  Recently our group of friends has been getting together for no real reason, just celebrating life.  No keyboard, monitor or social media platform can take the place of hanging out and laughing your fool heads off.  #tweetshmeet…no contest!

Go ahead, amuse me is a weekly posting I will be having featuring another funny blogger.  Or maybe not a blogger … you could just be a funny person.  So, if you would like to be featured all you have to do is email me at allfookedup@gmail.com and send me a funny post.  If I AGREE that it’s funny, I’ll simply put up your post with a short intro that you write so that my readers will check out your blog.  Of course, you also need to put up a link to my blog saying that you’re being featured over here.

 

See? WIN-WIN … hope to hear from you … or not!

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4 Comments

  1. mara
    June 21, 2012

    I recognize myself in ADD Andrew and will self-reflect accordingly. Also, ** I love you for writing his post *hugs* I have teenagers too…

  2. Tracy Lalonde
    June 21, 2012

    Oh thank you Universe! I am not alone!!

  3. Juliette
    June 23, 2012

    Feeling good, feeling great!
    Juliette recently posted..אלומיניום 2My Profile

  4. Whitney Powel
    June 26, 2012

    Great post. Thanks for the share. I love social media.
    Whitney Powel recently posted..Herbal Appetite Suppressants – Helps you lose WeightMy Profile

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