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In which Amendment 1 pisses me off

 

Written yesterday, election day

I’ve lived in North Carolina most of my life.  The only period that I didn’t live here was 10 years when I was in college and then I moved to the New York Area. I really love this state because I thought it was a great place to grow up as well as a great place to raise kids.  While there isn’t as much in the way of the “arts” most things are accessible from here and there’s a plethora of things to do.

 

Beyond that, we have the beach and the mountains and it’s an incredibly green and beautiful state.  In short, I love it here and I’m glad that Kevin agreed to move down here.

 

When I was growing up it was a fairly “southern” state but I don’t really consider it too “southern” anymore.  Between Charlotte, the Research Triangle, and the many incredible medical centers we have the state has become more progressive and people from elsewhere have moved here.

 

However, I felt compelled to go vote today because of Amendment 1.  What is Amendment 1? It is a change to the CONSTITUTION of North Carolina that states the following:

 

Sec. 6. Marriage.

Marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized in this State. This section does not prohibit a private party from entering into contracts with another private party; nor does this section prohibit courts from adjudicating the rights of private parties pursuant to such contracts.

 

They want to amend the NC State constitution to ban same sex unions.  Now there have been many states that already have a ban on same sex unions and they have been removing the bans but North Carolina wants to ADD a ban.

 

Here’s what I don’t get.  Other than the fact that I’m a “live and let live” person, it doesn’t make sense to me.  “Happy” people are better and more positive contributors to society as a whole so WHY would we want to keep people from being married?  If the union is stable, and I certainly don’t know the statistics on this but there are NEVER any guarantees, why wouldn’t you let ANY couple who choses to marry?

 

If being married makes you happy and being happy makes you a better member of society, isn’t that beneficial to everyone?  How is making one segment of society unhappy a good thing?

 

Supporters of the amendment argue that without an amendment banning same-sex unions, situations in which married same-sex couples will move here from states like New York and will seek legal rights and they argue that the state is not “equipped to handle that.”  The argument is that they’re going to come here from other places and then we’re going to have to deal with their divorces and custody issues and “we’re not equipped to handle that?”

 

People who move to the state now, and trust me North Carolina is always trying to get people to move to this state, also have the same chance of divorce and/or custody issues?

 

Are they expecting a huge onslaught on “gay” couples to move here and then we’re stuck with them?  I would argue that any couple in a “happy” union is probably a benefit to the state.  They’re no less likely to divorce than any other couple.  In fact, the divorce rate is astonishing and people are getting married later and less often anyways so you would think that we could all be proponents of marriage, not opponents.

 

Supporters also argue that voters should settle the issue and that polls indicate that there is support for such an amendment. “It is too serious a topic for a handful of people (legislators) to make a decision like that.”

 

There was no decision to make until they campaigned to add this amendment. The constitution never banned them before and therefore there wasn’t anything for the legislators to decide.  No, this was brought about because of Conservative groups deciding that they should have the right to tell people how to live their lives.

 

I don’t often get political on this blog but this entire thing is just stupid.  I propose that we add an amendment that says that “stupid” people can’t actually make any decisions in regard to governing this country.  That way, the people who have BRAINS in their heads can possible move forward.

 

We have so many problems in America right now and spending time, money and effort on something like this is just plain ridiculous.  I just went and voted AGAINST Amendment 1.  I have no idea what will happen but I was definitely approached by conservative voting groups on the way into the polls.

 

I’ll be deeply disappointed if this Amendment isn’t voted down and I might have to get political and my new “anti-stupid” people amendment off the ground.

 

This is just my opinion and you’re entitled to disagree if you want but how would you feel if someone told you “you couldn’t marry the person you love.”

 

I’m just saying …

 

Unbelievable.  The amendment passed.  Amendment 1 fucking passed.  This state and it’s people have completely disappointed me.  My entire family went and voted against this amendment.  Duke University, Carolina and a bunch of other colleges completely mobilized but it wasn’t enough.  In Orange County, where Carolina is, the vote was 80% against but the FOR Amendment 1 people came out in droves.

This is just stupid people. STUPID! I’m embarrassed for this state: North Carolina, you are made of FAIL!

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43 Comments

  1. Mayor Gia
    May 9, 2012

    I agree. With all the words. The fact that its passed hurts my heart.
    Mayor Gia recently posted..Food Hangover: UGGGGHHHHHHHMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      I know…I’m so embarrassed for this state!

  2. I completely agree with you. I went and voted early JUST to vote against Amendment 1. But people are ignorant and fear is an incredible political weapon. They refuse to see the implications to non-same-sex partnerships as well as the legal battles we are going to be facing in this state for YEARS to come. Just to have it overturned in the end.

    The Kidless Kronicles

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      I never really thought it would pass. I’m shocked

  3. Jester Queen
    May 9, 2012

    That’s why this needs to be a national issue. There’s no justice when the majority rules in every single situation. I really hope the supreme court overturns prop 8. That would start the gears turning to make things come out more fair. I’m as disgusted by this as you are.

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      It was really popular in the rural areas. People are so stupid

  4. Julie
    May 9, 2012

    Although I am a Republican (don’t hate), I am far from conservative. I totally agree with your position on this. My (straight) daughter was the President of her high schools “Gay/Straight Alliance”. Discrinination at any level is bull shit. Great post, btw.

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      thanks…

    • Dawn
      May 9, 2012

      I love that you wrote this, Julie.

      • Hujan
        June 7, 2012

        Pretty nice post. I just stumbled upon your wbleog and wished to say that I’ve really enjoyed surfing around your blog posts. After all I will be subscribing to your feed and I hope you write again very soon!

        • Lynn
          June 7, 2012

          thanks … i appreciate it

  5. Robin
    May 9, 2012

    I’ll support your Anti-Stupid People amendment. What an embarrassment for NC.

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      i totally agree with you

  6. Melanie
    May 9, 2012

    We had a similar measure pass here in California a few years back. I was shocked and saddened that our state passed it. I rallied and went door to door for months previous to the vote trying to get people to see it as a Civil Rights issue, which is really what it is. The Christian right here was able to spend millions and get a lot of support to make people see it as an “abomination of normalcy” issue. (I am not anti-Christian. I am anti gay hating fanatic).

    Whenever someone says “Letting gays get married is going to ruin the sanctity of marriage” I respond with, “Umm, how about the 51% of straight marriages ending in divorce? That doesn’t too so much to help it either.” I’ve babbled enough. This issue is close to my heart. It made me very sad when I saw your amendment had passed like ours did.

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      Me too! I never thought it would pass

  7. Carol
    May 9, 2012

    True! I agree with this amendment! This is surely a great post :) I love it..
    Carol recently posted..moving companiesMy Profile

  8. Jen Anderson
    May 9, 2012

    I’m on your side. I hope that this triggers positive change on the national level. We’re a large, diverse country, but it’s ridiculous that we’re doing this piecemeal. And embarrassing that South Africa has marriage equality and the US doesn’t.

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      There’s such a difference between the rural areas and the cities too…

      • Jen Anderson
        May 9, 2012

        We have the same problem in NYC. I’m just so glad that we were able to legislate marriage equality. I fear what would’ve happened had we put it to a vote. Even then, it took us more than one try. All us liberal city folk are outnumbered by the rest of the state. But down here in the city, because of higher salaries than upstate, we pay more in state taxes than we get back. They don’t mind us godless liberals paying for their Walmarts and sprawl, but heaven forfend we ask them to stop legislating bigotry.
        Jen Anderson recently posted..SighsMy Profile

  9. Carla In CA
    May 9, 2012

    I read you everyday you pop up in my email and today felt compelled to say thank you for your insight, thinking thoughts that make me realize I cant be that insane, and for sharing about this DUMB A$$ issue.

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      Thanks…I appreciate that. I just felt like I had to say something

  10. Pamela D Hart
    May 9, 2012

    Great post Lynn and I agree 100%. It’s a very sad day in America when people can’t get MARRIED in the 21st century. And it’s total BS when the religious excuse is same-sex marriage is a “threat” to heterosexual marriage. The 6 states (and D of C) that permit same-sex marriage have lower divorce rates than the bible belt states. That tells me the only threat to heterosexual marriage is divorce.
    Pamela D Hart recently posted..Run-A-Way Emotions Are Worse Than AnthraxMy Profile

  11. alaina
    May 9, 2012

    I live by Raleigh and I am also disappointed. This state sure has taken two steps back and no steps forward with this one. I read an argument for the amendment where the author stated that she didn’t understand what the issue was because gay people have the same rights straight people do – gay men can marry any girl they want – that “preference” shouldn’t matter. What kind of bullshit is that!
    alaina recently posted..Ethical Shortcut.My Profile

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      I’m embarrassed for the state as a whole…can’t believe it passed

  12. Dawn
    May 9, 2012

    I was so glad to see you write about this, Lynn. This issue angers me in so many ways – haven’t we learned enough history to realize that bigotry and hatred are BAD??? The hubs and I were just talking about this before I read your post, and the only consolation I see from this is that now the state supreme court will get involved and, of course, rule the amendment UNCONSTITUTIONAL (because clearly it is) just like the other states’ higher courts have done before them. And, the irony in all this? Those same proponents of “social conservatism” will also tell us how they want “less government” because government spends too much money. What? Not only were tax dollars used to finance this election, but they will also be used to finance the upcoming court battle. And all because those groups think government should dictate what goes on in our homes – instead of protecting us from unethical business practices (health insurance companies, anyone?) I think a serious anti-stupid campaign needs to start, and you should start by removing all the lawmakers who fell asleep during social studies (which, from the looks of things, is just about everyone on the Hill these days).

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      What a fantastic comment. I really have nothing to add but I’ll be curious to see what happens next

      • Dawn
        May 9, 2012

        Thanks :)
        And now I shall get off my soapbox ’cause I’m sure I’ll have plenty of opportunity to climb back up there in the coming months, right?

  13. Gigi
    May 9, 2012

    Oh, I’m so sorry!

    I love how people get all up in arms about “protecting the sanctity of marriage” when really all they’re protecting is crap like businesses’ rights not to extend health insurance to same-sex couples.

    • Lynn
      May 9, 2012

      it really was a bunch of crap but I think the problem is that the rural people are completely snowed and don’t even know what they’re voting for

  14. Liz
    May 9, 2012

    Such disappointing news out of NC today, especially in light of President Obama’s announcement of support! :(

    • Lynn
      May 10, 2012

      Loved that Obama made such a statement

  15. Name *
    May 9, 2012

    This absolutely sickens me, and Lynn, I strongly agree with your comment above, “the problem is that the rural people are completely snowed and don’t even know what they’re voting for.” So much of this stems from lack of education. You put the good old Bible behind anything and there are always a group of people that will take it verbatim.

    The bottom line is that love is love. With anything, if you are coming from a place of mutual respect, compassion, love and understanding the answer will be clear. Fear, ignorance and self-righteous bullshit fuels this campaign, and what does it accomplish? Does it stop gay’s from being gay? Of course not. What it does however, is make perfectly clear one point. That some people will always have small minds, small thoughts, and small worlds. Their sense of love, compassion and understanding is pathetically atrophied.

    It is indeed a sad day for North Carolina.

    • Lynn
      May 10, 2012

      Great comment girl!!!

  16. Dhyan
    May 9, 2012

    Hi Lynn.. This is kinda disappointing and I guess a lot of people would think this is not a very good news to them..
    Dhyan recently posted..aerials essexMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 10, 2012

      It’s an awful law

  17. In a word – Stupid!

    In any other guise this is unlawful discrimination. In the UK we have employment law that does not allow discrimination against “married persons and civil partners in the employment field”, yet individual US states can rule against it. What I don’t understand is how, just because it comes under the guise of religion, it can even be allowed let alone be lawful to rule against a whole section of the population.

    Does this mean that if the church suddenly decided that it was wrong to be non-white that US states would go back to the 1950s and before? No, this would be racial discrimination and there would be uproar and rightly so.

    Seriously, I don’t see the difference. If we were made different colours who is to say that we weren’t made to be different in ways of sexual orientation also…..

    Surely, while these type of rulings are allowed, regardless of whether it is supposed to be a constitutional right or not (in fact, should it be allowed within the constitution to rule against a whole proportion of the population – that is different than freedom of speech in my humble opinon….) racism and other types of discrimination will continue to prevail because at the end of the day discrimination is one and the same whichever form it takes. If one is allowed, where is the legitimate argument to not allow another…..

    As Mayor Gia said “makes my head hurt”

    Rant over

    • Lynn
      May 10, 2012

      It’s crazy because it’s going to really mess up bringing new businesses to the state and such. Conceived in ignorance

  18. Karen
    May 10, 2012

    Made me ill that it passed…I live in the Greensboro area and we had tons of people against it, but I saw signs of people for it too. We’re still such a conservative state, although many would like to think we aren’t. Let’s get a Repeal Amendmen One movement going! Get this stupid thing repealed already….dumb.

    • Lynn
      May 10, 2012

      Me too! I mean, I live in Greensboro

  19. Laina
    May 10, 2012

    I want to start the “Stupid people can’t make decisions that affect other people” petition with you. I live in Ohio, and we have had our share of stupidity of late and I, too, am sick and tired of it. I’m with you, sister :)

    • Lynn
      May 11, 2012

      oh, stupid people are everywhere. Not just here. Let’s do it! but not yet, i’m kinda busy right now

  20. T
    May 16, 2012

    The large amounts of military folks in the state contribute more to the divorce rate than the gays would. I was personally married in VA and divorced in NC. And I know countless people who were also divorced there. Divorce isn’t all that uncommon in the military world. Maybe we should ban allowing military people to marry.

    Kidding folks, but that’s how friggin stupid this Amendment is.

    • Lynn
      May 16, 2012

      I couldn’t agree more…its crap

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