This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!
Lately I’ve been getting an incredible amount of junk mail to my main email account. Now I have an email account for this blog (allfookedup@gmail.com) but obviously I have an email that I have always had for years for real stuff. I mean can you imagine me fillingin my email address for school and stuff with my All Fooked Up address?
Don’t answer, that was rhetorical.
So other than the normal bullshit I have been receiving missives from both Match.com and eHarmony lately. For example, the other day I received this:
As you can imagine, I was terribly excited at the thought of getting a date 7/days a week. Between that and hanging with my husband I’d be pretty damn busy right? Well, this was about the billionth email I had received from them so I sent out the following Tweet:
I mean, it’s only natural to wonder right? I was quite surprised when I received the following response from eHarmony later that day.
I was really impressed that they contacted me. At any rate, Kevin was out of town so Daniel and I went out to eat (shockingly enough I didn’t feel like cooking) and I was telling Daniel about the eHarmony tweets when we had the following conversation:
Daniel: So eHarmony keeps contacting you?
Me: Yeah, I think I can get them to stop now.
Daniel: I wonder why you were getting them
Me: Maybe it was your father
Daniel: What?
Me: Wouldn’t it be funny if your father signed me up for eHarmony?
Daniel: Why would he do that?
Me: Maybe he’s going to dump me and he wants to make sure I can get a date first
Daniel: (Laughing) yeah, maybe he’s being thoughtful like that
Now we’re both cracking up at the thought of Kevin getting me another match before he dumped me so I decided to ask him. I related the conversation that I’d had with Daniel to him and here’s what Kevin said:
Kevin Damn, there wasn’t supposed to be a way to trace it back to me
Me: So, you are dumping me?
Kevin: Yeah, I am
Me: Well thanks for helping me out and being so thoughtful by getting me a date. 7 days a week no less!
Kevin: I’m a nice guy like that.
So you see? Sometimes the mail that you think is junk is really a forewarning of your future. Thanks eHarmony!!
Isn’t that just lovely of your husband?
In other, totally unrelated news: My mom homework advice just got outsourced. While I was reading your blog, my son asked me what eloquent means. I guess I did not give him the answer that matched his expectations because he trolled off and said: “I am just going to to my homework with dad.”
hahaha…good job
I actually met Himself on match.com.
But we didn’t tell them that, because we didn’t to get contact about a promotion and then be told, upon seeing us in person, “Ummm…maybe you could write us a testimonial…”
Things like that are bad for your ego.
Lori recently posted..I’m ready for my close-up.
i think those sites are great! I’m just not sure why they want me. In theory, i’m already married!
For some reason the fact that the eHarmony tweet guy said “Ya” bugs me. Crazy, eh? So, good luck with the dating thing!
Cheers,
Casey
i haven’t actually taken them up on their offer of matchmaking… why would i want more than the one husband i have? right?
Who knew eharmony was based in Wi? The ya is the tip off.
thats funny. I just don’t know why all of a sudden I’m getting so much crap from all these sites. To my main email too! It’s driving me nuts.
um…i fucking love you…why am i just now finding your blog?!?!
what an awesome comment! ummm…possibly due to the fact that i do a shit job promoting myself…that’s why. thanks for that compliment!!!
They must figure you just have SO much love to go around :)
either that or maybe i’m just a great catch!
I can’t believe they tweeted back! How funny!
Paula @ thewilyweez recently posted..F*ck You Fridays: Round Two
I know…it was funny
LOL, I have to say the on the internet dating or electronic dating has come a very long way from the days of easy chat rooms. A lot more and more people are turning to on the internet dating sites to display likely dates.
Oh…I don’t have a problem with Internet dating. It’s just that I’m married and I’m getting tons of emails from tons of sites all of a sudden