This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which Google fucks with my mind

Goddamnit! Google’s fucking with my mind. Seriously, I have spent the last month or two building up some relationships on the internet (ok, maybe just a few weeks, but still). I am following about 10 blogs at this point and I try to get on at least every two days and see what new posts these people have put up. Why these blogs? I don’t know. I like funny, interesting people. There’s a dearth of them out there so when I find a kindred spirit, I’m enjoying reading what they have to say. I’ve even found a few people that seem to be sharing a brain with me and are writing my personal feelings out in their blogs. One such person might even, and SSSHHHH… it’s a secret, be FUNNIER than me. (By the way, that kind of pisses me off!)

At any rate, I got on my blog yesterday and went to my “dashboard” and Google informed me that I wasn’t following any blogs. “WTF?” I replied to Google. (actually, this was a thought bubble conversation as, unlike my navigational system bitch lady, Google has no voice). All yesterday I tried to find my blogs and I couldn’t. This morning I get on and voila! All my blogs are there so I was thrilled and decided to work out. Later, I come home, all ready to catch up and read and possibly comment (I always have something to say, even if I don’t know shit about the subject I’m never devoid of an opinion) but guess what? I HAVE NO BLOGS AGAIN! Where the hell are they? They were here this morning. Why is this happening to me? I think it’s because my login was under my real email and I was advised to get a Gmail address. I did, I got

Now, it seems to be my email default and I can’t figure out how to get my old email back as it only gives me the option of deleting my old email. So I went and checked my Gmail account and NO, I’m not getting any email there, I’m getting it at my real account. So, where the fuck are my blogs? Is this a conspiracy? Make Lynn feel dumb as shit? (Actually dumber than shit, I’m dumb as shit on a normal day). The irony of this entire situation is that way back in the day, I was a computer person. Seriously, I knew (and still know), how to take a computer apart and put it back again. I was a programmer and yet, all this shit keeps happening to me and I can’t figure out WHY?

This is just one of the many frustrating encounters that Google and I keep having. If I didn’t know better, I would say that Google is a 19 year old teenage girl trying to screw with my head. These are the type of interactions I keep having with my kids. So, if I’m a follower of your blog who’s slacking off on the following part, it’s just part of the general conspiracy to ruin my life.

I’m just saying…

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  1. uberscribbler
    November 17, 2010

    A small bit of advice: Bookmark the chosen blogs on your browser.

    Myself, I follow only three: Daily Kos, The Washington Monthly, and Glenn Greenwald. I find those three give me all the current news I need (even if the current goings on inside the Beltway are taking years off my life).

    But depending on Google to retain anything? That's like trying to listen for the Voices that guided The Maid of Orleans.

  2. Red Shoes
    November 17, 2010

    It's a conspiracy… a conspiracy I tell you!!!



  3. Wally J
    November 17, 2010

    Come on back!

    – Wally J

  4. DawnG
    November 17, 2010

    Interestingly enough, I sometimes can't access MY OWN BLOG! I've had the gmail account since well before attempting the blog thingy and it is at blogspot… so, it isn't like trying to converse with a 19 yr. old. More like trying to get sense out of a 3 year old….

  5. King of New York Hacks
    November 17, 2010

    Sounds like they are Fooking with you more than Fucking with you…damn lousy cork-soakers. They violate your farging rights. Dis somanumbatching blogging was founded so that the liberties of common patriotic bloggers are not Fooked with by a bunch of fargin iceholes….ok, I love the movie Johnny Dangerously. LOL…I have problems too occasionally, but it seems to work out after a few days. :-)

  6. Crystal
    November 17, 2010

    I saw your post on Twitter–you are funny, lady. And correct. Google is really Big Brother. He knows when you are badmouthing him and he punishes you. This I am convinced of.

  7. Emma Jayne
    November 18, 2010

    I have just started using Google Reader and it is sooo much easier to follow several blogs (yours is at the top, natch).

  8. Sarah
    November 18, 2010

    The cyber world is a parallel universe designed to infiltrate the lives of mere mortals and bombard them with frustration and distraction.

    Don't let the buggers win! Or the terrorists!

  9. Jonas Zahler
    January 17, 2011

    I appreciated reading the opst, but I don’t think it’s fair that you simply do not offer an RSS feed!

    • Lynn
      January 17, 2011

      I do have an RSS feed.

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