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In which he bugs me about my car

Lexus

I got a new car a few months ago and it’s funny how the difference between and men and women are so VERY glaring when it comes to new cars.  Kevin is what you would call “anal” about his car so here are a few of the comments I’ve received lately:

 

You know Lynn; you really need to get your car washed.

I know I know but I really don’t care so much about the outside of the car.

 

Lynn, this car really needs to be vacuumed out.  Look at all those leaves.

Well, they’re all on the passenger side and I’m never a passenger so don’t look at me.

 

Why are there scuffmarks on the dashboard.

I don’t know Kevin.  WHO in the world puts their feet up there? Could it be you?

 

Why haven’t you set all the phone numbers yet?

I did, in fact, set all the numbers but then iOS7 came out and I had to reboot the system and the fucking car erased them. It’s too boring to put them back.

 

This car needs to be dusted.

Jesus Christ! I don’t even do that in the house!

 

Why is there cat hair in here?

Perhaps because you won’t allow the animals in your car and they go to the VETS and apparently, they shed in my car!

 

I can’t believe you haven’t set all the radio stations yet.

There are 30 settings! I set some but Kevin wants all these specialty sports stations.  It’s not like I hang out in my car for HOURS when I’m not driving.  Perhaps if I was in the carpool line like the old days I would have had time but no, just no!

 

What do you mean you don’t know what this button is for?

There’s like a million buttons all with cryptic acronyms. I’m not an NSA officer and I can’t remember what they’re all for.

 

Didn’t you read the ownership manual?

Seriously? People do this?

 

Why is your car so dirty?

Ummm…because I drive OUTSIDE maybe?

 

What kind of mileage are you getting?

Am I supposed to be on top of all that shit?  I never was before.

 

How do you not know how to program that?

Well, I tend to forget stuff. You know that Kevin.

You really need to get this car washed Lynn!

I think I’ve heard this already.

 

So that’s my life with my new car.  Is your husband like this???

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11 Comments

  1. Marilynn
    November 30, 2013

    No, not even about the house. But I could follow my husband around with the vacuum 24/7 and there would still be fir needles everywhere. I just give up…but I’m over 70 so I’ve drunk 12000 gallons of water. Hehe

  2. Julie
    December 9, 2013

    I have to pull out the manual every time the clocks change. (And that car and I have experienced many, many time changes. You’d think I could remember how to do it, but NO!)

    • Lynn
      December 10, 2013

      It is just so annoying having to program every little thing

  3. Theresa
    December 9, 2013

    Dear Kevin: You’ve been married forever…Joe and I have been married forever. … Here is the thing. This is a dad’s job. It is MEN’s work! Sort of like taking out trash. Easy peasy lemon squeezy….Think of it as Lynn’s Hannukah gift… You program everything for her, and detail out the car. It will be sooooo nice of you… reallly…. I promise…. Because Engineers like to program all that stuff. And it makes our life easier, that it is already done! Not that your marriage was in danger, but I think I just saved it for you. You are welcome!
    Just sign me…
    Team Lynn on this one!

    • fonda
      December 9, 2013

      I would agree with all this, except my husband would somehow manage to tie all the controls to his iPad, and I would never be able to change the radio station again!

      • Lynn
        December 10, 2013

        hahaha

    • Lynn
      December 10, 2013

      awww…thanks Theresa. Appreciate the backup

  4. Jodi
    December 10, 2013

    This sounds just like conversations about my car, except we have kids still in our house, so we have the following conversation:

    Husband: Why does your car have so much junk in it?

    Me: I don’t know. Could it be that I haul our three children around with me, and they leave stuff in the car that I don’t even see because I never, ever ride in the back seat?

    • Lynn
      December 11, 2013

      I used to have that exact conversation. Of course, don’t even start about the “crumbs” from snacks they ate.

  5. Name *
    December 13, 2013

    I think we are married to the same man. Except that I dont have a new car. I have the new car he wanted before he changed his mind and wanted the truck. Now I have the car that apparently nobody wants and he harrases me about keeping it clean. I hear all the same stuff you do daily!!! I am so glad to heat im not alone.

    • Lynn
      December 14, 2013

      men are stupid. If my kids were ever in his car during carpool he would have understood.

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