This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!
Oh my god guys, my dog is driving me crazy! Seriously he’s worse then my children. At least with them I can get them to do what I need them to but Tucker is the worst.
I don’t truly understand it because although he’s an incredibly attractive dog I’ve never been struck by his intelligence but now he’s outsmarting Kevin and myself.
Here’s what is occurring.
As you know Tucker has some sort of growth/infection on his foot, which requires an e-collar (is that what it’s called?) and medication. So he has to take this antibiotic twice a day. They’re pretty big pills.
Before all of this he took a) a thyroid pill to keep his weight on and b) a steroid to hopefully keep his stupid tumor in check and c) a pain pill because he walks like an old man because d) he actually is an old man.
Now his steroid is a chewable and he’s always been pretty happy to just eat it and the other two pills I always threw in his dry food and boom … he ate them all. I mostly just gave him those pills with his breakfast although occasionally I gave him another pain pill (actually he only gets ½ a pain pill at a time) at nighttime depending on how he was walking.
All this kept the little guy going perfectly and everyone who sees him assumes he’s a puppy.
So then he got this infection and all of a sudden I had this gigantic capsule to give him. I knew it would never work in his food so I have to shove it down his throat twice a day, which is truly a feat. I say that because he is biting me and spitting it out and I practically have to shove the damn thing down to his rectum.
Anyways I have been doing that since last week and guess what? All of a sudden Tucker figures out how to pick through his dog food and not eat his other pills. I thought dogs were color-blind but he’s avoiding the white pill (pain) and today he even avoided the chewable.
So I know you’re going to say peanut butter? Well, even though he’s not allowed to have peanut butter because he almost died of pancreatitis I did cover the pain pill in peanut butter and he spit it out. Now he takes each pellet of dog food and drops it on the floor and seriously, one by one he goes through them and ONLY EATS HIS FOOD.
This morning I had all 3 pills left. ALL THREE PILLS!!!
Yesterday I was eating cottage cheese and he loves cottage cheese and he licked the plate so I shoved his pills in the cottage cheese and he ate 2 out of 3. The thing is I’m not supposed to give him real food.
Don’t tell me to try pill pockets because I’m not allowed even though I think it might be better for him to die then me to kill myself because of all this. Anyhow, this morning I bought some wet food (prescription of course … yes it all costs a bundle) and my hope is to shove the pills in there and hopefully he will eat them without realizing it.
The moral of the story is don’t have dogs. Or don’t have sick dogs. Or don’t have OCD sick dogs. Or don’t have dogs on medicine.
Frankly, I have no moral. I’m just going crazy one pet at a time.