This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!
I had some funny conversations while I was at ESPN and I thought I’d share them with you. I tried to tell Keely and Andie about them but of course, they think every conversation I ever have is dumb so … you get them instead.
John: This day is about seeing ESPN. You need to remember that all these guys are working today and this is their job.
John: The point is that this day isn’t really about autographs.
Me: so you’re saying that nobody will be expecting me to sign autographs.
John: so, this is where the hair and makeup is done before show time.
Me: well that’s a relief
Me: I thought this was some sort of a hint that I needed a new hairdo and I needed to wear makeup but this was just for SHOW so that’s a relief.
Chris: (looking at Daniel) hey, education is overrated!
Me: don’t listen to him Daniel.
And then a bit later, he walked towards where we were sitting and called a takeout place for a tuna sandwich. He hung up the phone and I said:
Me: hey thanks for ordering me lunch but what are you going to eat?
He looked a bit taken aback but introduced himself to Kevin and Daniel and he was quite personable. Kevin and Daniel just shook their head. I suppose I just can’t behave.
Chris: hey I meant it, education is overrated. Look at Chris Berman. He got a degree from Brown but they just handed it to him.
We cracked up and he continued:
Chris: but Ditka and I, we didn’t graduate from college. Neither did Keyshawn.
Me: well, that’s because you guys have TALENT. Daniel doesn’t so he needs an education.
Chris: hey you guys, did you hear that? This mom just said her kid had NO TALENT!
And then we all laughed. He was fun.
John: so I was busy while you guys were at the show
Kevin: what was going on?
John: Billy Chrystal called and he wants to promote his new movie on SportsCenter.
John: he plays a retired sportscaster in the movie (Parental Guidance) and wants to promote it on SportsCenter since he is a big sports fan.
Me: that’s awesome, what’s he going to do?
John: he’s going to co-host SportsCenter. I need to set it up.
Me: wait! What? I didn’t realize that cohosting SportsCenter was an option. I’d like to co-anchor SportsCenter.
John: well, you can as soon as you have a movie to promote.
Chris: how’d you like the show?
Kevin: it was great
Me: you seemed a little pissed off (he was but justifiably so)
He seemed taken aback that I had said that (rude I know but he was pissed off) but he said that he felt one of the segments was inappropriate considering the shootings of two days before. Of course, Kevin and Daniel just shook their head that I said that to him.
Chris: sometimes as a quarterback you have to get upset with your linemen when they’re doing something wrong. That’s how it works.
Well, can’t argue with that can ya?
All in all … a terrific visit and probably the best present I’ve ever bought.