In which i discuss lists

Today I’d like to discuss lists. I’m married to a list maker. Every week I start out with a handwritten list of “Things for Lynn to Do This Week.” Every thing Kevin does is well thought out and methodical and his lists are no exception. It’s all written in his Franklin Planner and if it’s not on there, it’s simply not going to happen. He likes to get things done. I once joked to him when we just started dating, “does it say on there, make plans to get laid today?”

I thought I’d share my new list with you today. Kevin says this is just the “short” list, by the way.

1.      Get the body shop and insurance information for Daniels wreck (yup, he wrecked his car).

2.      Call the carpenter to look at the rotten wood on the house trim (didn’t I do something similar to this last year? I mean really, again?)

3.      Find someone to work on our gutters and downspouts (Why me?)

4.      Talk to the pool guys about fixing the pool lights (Okay. I actually did this one because I have a party coming up and I want the lights on)

5.     Get the bushes that are up against the house trimmed (this is related to item number 2 as obviously the bushes are rotting the wood.

6.     Aeration/seeding. Get it done. (Isn’t it enough that I mow the lawn? Must I do everything?)

7.      Mail my nephew his stuff from this summer. (It’s been two months. He’s lived this long without it so does he really, really need it?)

8.     Find out how much the insurance is per car so we can compare quotes (is he serious? That’s going to require me to dig into the filing cabinet.)

That’s my current list. It doesn’t include all the mundane matters like paperwork including medical reimbursement bullshit and bills. But here’s my point. I hate doing stuff. I understand why Kevin gives me this list because he works – a lot. But should I be punished because I don’t work by having to do all these tedious little tasks. Shouldn’t we both do what we’re good at? For Kevin, that’s running a business and noticing all the little details in life. For me, it’s doing nothing. Why should I have to change what I’m good at? If I’m good at doing nothing, should I have to interrupt that by actually doing something? That makes no sense to me.

The other day we were discussing lists because I have so very many of them laying around my desk, mostly incomplete. I asked him why, oh why, does he keep making me more lists when I never do most of the ones I already have? He replied that he figures I do about 20% of each list so if he adds more items, then more stuff is likely to be done. Not a bad strategy in my opinion. At any rate, I cull through the many line items and cherrypick the ones that don’t look too, too boring to do. I do those items, as well as any that seem to be either important to me or at the very least, dire.

It’s my opinion that the house is standing, it’s not condemned. The neighborhood association hasn’t complained about the lawn, the kids seem to be fed and clothed so seriously, WHAT DO PEOPLE WANT FROM ME? If you have anything to add, feel free to submit it to me – in list form. Okay

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