This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which i find it ironic

I find it ironic that I’m addicted to my statistics on my blog when, in fact, that course was the bane of my existence in college.  My major was Mathematical Sciences, which was pure mathematics with statistics and computers thrown in there.  I know you guys are laughing at the computer part but you need to remember that back in 1981, computers were about the size of your living room and it was a BIG DEAL to be able to write a computer program.

 

At any rate, I had to take Statistics, and pass it, to graduate and very frankly I sucked at it.  It didn’t help that I had a Chinese teacher and a Korean Teachers assistant, neither of whom I could understand.  To help myself, I got a tutor and he was Indian.  In short, it’s a miracle I ever graduated from that school.  But I digress…

 

The point it, I have statistics on my blog and I love checking them out.  I have Google Analytics but honestly, I never look at them because they’re kind of boring.  Nope, what I really like is my StatCounter stats.  You can see where the person is coming from and how long they’re on and how many pages they check out.  You see how many visits they’ve had and you can practically tell their underwear color.  I like to speculate how many people are ignoring their jobs to check out blogs all over the world.

 

So, I spend a few times a day checking out my statistics.  The problem is, they’re going down.  The longer I blog, the less people read it.  No, not really but sometimes it feels like that.  I know this micromanagement is a bad idea but being that I’m a little on the OCD side, I have no self-control.

 

When I’m roaming around on the web I see hundreds of people reading hundreds of blogs and I think “why aren’t they here?”  Then I remember that I’m all about being non-competitive and realize what a stupid, shallow human being I really am.  The problem is, I’m a moody bitch.  Yeah, I said “A MOODY BITCH.”

 

Most of the time I don’t give a shit about what’s going on and I’m perfectly happy just writing out my opinions and stories and not worrying about the rest but sometimes I would be happy if just a few more people were reading.  Of course, the fact that I’ve barely been on Twitter, barely been engaging other people, and barely been reading and commenting on other blogs might have something to do with the problem.

 

I have a huge list of sites where people have recommended I submit my writing to and I’ve submitted my posts to exactly NONE.  It’s not that I don’t want them to be spread around more widely; it just seems like such a hassle.  Once I’ve written the post, it’s already incredibly difficult to force myself to edit it.  Then I have to load it into WordPress.  This is basically as much as I can handle.

 

To submit to other sites I would need to be copying and pasting and emailing and contacting and very frankly, while I would like all this done, it’s way too boring for me.  So here’s the conundrum.  How do you spread the word if you’re TOO DAMN LAZY to actually spread the word?  You see?

 

So, that’s where I am today. Normally I have to make a bet to have any staying power.  For example, when I started this blog my kids said I wouldn’t last so I vowed to last 6 months.  After redesigning my blog site, I extended it to 12 months.  That 12 months is up in August and I’m trying to determine if I want to continue and if so, do I want to make it bigger, better, what?

 

Also, Keely told me to “quit screwing around and just write the book!”  So, there you are my dilemma.  I think what would be easiest is if I could just hire one of you to submit this shit everywhere and do all the busy work.  Kind of like an assistant or a secretary.

 

Are there any volunteers out there? ANYBODY?  HELLO?  Somebody tell me what to do!

 

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30 Comments

  1. auntie e
    May 17, 2011

    i’m with keely

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      hahaha…ok, the most important person has spoken. I’ll do it…oh, and I’m going to take a sculpture course in July too

  2. Misfit Mommy
    May 17, 2011

    I think now might be a good time to visit some smaller blogs (no, I don’t mean mine – unless you want to!) and take yourself in a different direction. Maybe have some guest posts here? Mix it up a little!

    Don’t be so hard on yourself – and that’s coming from somebody with like, TWO readers…

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      Yeah, i’ve done that…i’m just not consistent. It’s ok..i think i’ve made some decisions regarding this blog now.

  3. Name *
    May 17, 2011

    Hi
    Im new here. First time actually. And I believe I saw your blog on a facebook banner. If that helps. And by the way, how did you get it on facebook like that?

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      ahhh…i took out an ad. So, thanks for reading my blog. Hope you enjoy it

  4. Alison@Mama Wants This
    May 17, 2011

    What’s your decision?

    Yes, growing a blog is damn hard work. Urgh.

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      Well, i think that i really need to start writing this book. I need to have an outline first. I’m so ADD with all this stuff…that’s why i can’t grow my blog because i always get so bored

  5. EmmaK
    May 17, 2011

    That is the dream! Getting an assistant. I’d like a sharp dressed gay man who’d do all my interior decor plus shop for gourmet food, help me pick out clothes and submit articles to online pubications. As soon as I start earning over $1 mill a year I’m going to Gay for Pay the gay employment agency to bag me one!

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      really? there’s an employment agency called Gay for Pay? hahaha…i don’t need help with decor. I could use someone to do my busy work and also cook for my family. I’m good with the rest.

  6. Pamela D Hart
    May 17, 2011

    I’m really OC and ADD too, so I know where you’re coming from and I’m working on a book, too…well trying to…in between all the mom shit (calling it that right now because my kid is driving me bat crazy!). If you’re really serious about an assistant, I LOVE that stuff, editing, etc., so email me. Other than that…can’t tell you what to do because you’re like me…you won’t listen anyway!!! ;-)
    Pamela D Hart recently posted..I’m a Blogaholic!My Profile

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      well, the problem is that i’m moody and sometimes I’ll do the stuff and sometimes I won’t. So there you are…right now, i’m just trying to muddle through my mood with my sanity intact.

      • Pamela D Hart
        May 17, 2011

        I know you’re moody…those are some of your best posts!!! ;-)

        • Lynn
          May 17, 2011

          hahaha…i have so many ranty posts that i don’t even put up because it’s just MORE of the SAME

  7. Lady Estrogen
    May 17, 2011

    You took out a FB ad? There’s fucking initiative right there! LOL

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      hahaha..did i say that in the post? hmmm…yeah, that’s easy to do

  8. Sarah Hague
    May 17, 2011

    I’d just stick with the moaning and stuff the rest. One day you’ll want to get off your backside and then you will. Until then, open a bottle, pour yourself a glass and chill. Cheers!

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      Sarah…you are too awesome. I usually work hard just until i’m close to being successful. Then i quit. Right now, i’m looking into sculpture workshops. I can’t ever do anything until success. The wine sounds good though.

  9. Katja Brown
    May 17, 2011

    How much would you pay somebody to do your “dirty work?”

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      Don’t know…haven’t really thought about it seriously

  10. Erin
    May 17, 2011

    I hear ya. And actually Statistics was the bane of my existence and prevented me from graduating from college. I took it three times and finally did graduate.

    • Lynn
      May 17, 2011

      I gotcha…hated it. I did pass and I did graduate though.

  11. Dave
    May 17, 2011

    Statistics was tough, I had to retake it, cause like you the fiirst professor I had had a rough accent which made things more difficult. If you have to spend time understanding what is being said, you are spending less time with understanding the subject.

    As far as the rest one day you’ll decide you want to put in that extra work, or you won’t. Really it’s about what you want to do and feel like doing. You are still new at all of this, so maybe as you get more experience you’ll want to do more. Or maybe you’ll get bored of the whole thing and do something else. That’s life.

    My point? Don’t stress over it. Time will tell the tale.

    • Lynn
      May 18, 2011

      Thanks for the comment…I try not to stress and be competitive but depending on my mood, you never know.

  12. Cathryn Louis
    May 18, 2011

    I’m also writing a book – and blogging. My blog is a series of weekly writing/editing exercises. Yep – every single post – with the goal of making me a better writer. Also, it’s a place to keep the lessons I’ve learned. But – I don’t pay attention to stats. Simply because my main goal is to finish my novel and I purposefully eliminate all the (non-family & paying the bills) stuff that distracts me from that. Why blog at all? Because it’s enough of a distraction that I can keep a fresh perspective while I write the novel. Take a deep breath, trash the stats and write your novel! :)
    Cathryn Louis recently posted..BlindsidedMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 18, 2011

      that’s interesting…the problem is that i’m not actually writing a novel. I’m going to write an autobiographical book and some of these posts are the little vignettes that will be in them. I do, however, need to get it together and get back to writing out my stories.

      Thanks for the comment.

  13. Cathryn Louis
    May 18, 2011

    So you’re really writing only one thing – even better! I’m sure you’ll get it done.

    • Lynn
      May 18, 2011

      Well, except I have np attention span, am writing this five times a week and I’m going to start sculpting again so we will see where the book falls in there.

  14. Kimberly
    May 22, 2011

    I”m right there with you! I love your blog, but would SO love to read your BOOK. I gave myself a little longer time frame on the blog. I’m hoping that within 18 months to 2 years, I’ll know if this little project will be something that brings me enough joy to continue.

    For now, I’m trying to live in the moment, enjoy “meeting” those people who seem to get me/my writing, and I have taken a solemn vow to begin writing my book this summer. (Ahem…I also took a solemn vow to hit the gym 5x a week this summer with NO excuses)
    Kimberly recently posted..Rapture Be pureMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 22, 2011

      i wanted to get an outline written for the book on the drive with Keely up to washington but we didn’t do it and we sung instead. oh well.

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