This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!
(Before I begin my post I must say HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO ME!!! 24 years my husband has put up with me and trust me, that’s no small task. That is all! Back to our regularly scheduled post!)
I’m about to get a new computer and I’m pretty excited although I’m also waiting for all the second guessing to begin. What second guessing you might be asking? Well, I’ll be happy to tell you. Last year, my Dell was on its last legs so I asked my computer guy what computer I should get and I’m still kicking myself in the ass for listening to him. He told me I could buy a new Dell or I could go local. What did that entail I asked? He responded that I could get a local computer company to “put together” a computer and I would be supporting the local economy.
Being the excellent Samaritan I am, I went with the latter option and boy do I regret it. First of all, we didn’t upgrade the screen I already had so it’s constantly deciding to play dead. Seriously, all will be well with the world and then all of a sudden, no visuals. Then I hit every button and have to unplug every cable until eventually, whatever PMS type situation caused the outage reverses it. On top of that, the damn system didn’t come loaded with any software. If you buy a Dell or a Gateway, you can get Microsoft office and all the other stuff you want on there but this computer was basically an empty slate so I had to spend tons of moohlah adding in the programs I like.
I also think there’s some mystery program that runs amuck in there because strange things happen. Long story short; I hate this fucking computer. After listening to my complaints for the better part of a year, Kevin has begged me to go buy a Mac. After all, I have and iPad and an iPhone so I should get with the program, right? So, last week Kevin and I went into the Apple store to look at computers and figure out what I wanted. We didn’t purchase the computer because I needed to come home and figure out the computer network which also needs to be upgraded because occasionally, and this is a major disaster, the Xbox doesn’t work well and Daniel loses at Halo as a result. So yeah, major intervention required there as well.
At any rate, I’ve now decided what to do and all I need to do is go into Apple and buy the damn thing…or do I? Yesterday, the following conversation took place between Kevin and I regarding the computer:
Me: “I went into Apple today.”
Kevin: “Oh yeah, how did that go?”
Me: “Good, good. I can get the computer I want, no problem.”
Kevin: “Really?”
Me: “Yeah and they even showed me all this cool stuff I could do with screenshots and stuff. It’s going to be so awesome!”
Kevin: “So, did you get it?”
Me: “Nope, I need to bring in my old computer so they can transfer all my libraries and stuff over.”
Kevin: “Are you going to do that this weekend?”
Me: “Maybe tomorrow.”
Kevin: “Did you ask them about all the networking stuff?”
Me: “No, I forgot.”
Kevin: “Did you ask them about Microsoft office?”
Me: “Yeah that doesn’t come with it.”
Kevin: “Did you tell them to load it on for you when you pay for them to set it up?”
Me: “They told me I had to download it.”
Kevin: “Did you tell them we owned 3 Apple computers, 4 iPhones, 5 iPods and and iPad and they should load it on for you?”
Me: “Nope, they told me I had to download it.”
Kevin: “You need to ask them for all those extras Lynn!”
Me: “Well, maybe I should wait until you’re with me then; you know I can’t do that stuff!”
Kevin: “Did you ask them how you set up the network?”
Me: “No, that didn’t occur to me.”
Kevin: Why didn’t you ask them that?”
Me: “Well the very nature of it’s not occurring to me means that I never thought about it, hence the NOT OCCURING to me, therefore how could I possibly ask a question about something that NEVER OCCURRED TO ME!”
Kevin: “Well, what else didn’t you ask?”
Me: “If I knew what I didn’t ask, then I would remember what I needed to ask!”
Kevin: “… and …”
Me: “… and therefore I would have asked it, right? But the mere fact that none of the types of questions you’re thinking about occurred to be should be indicative of my asking about them!”
Kevin: “Maybe you better wait for me.”
Me: “Ok, we’ll go on Saturday.”
Kevin: “So, how does it work?”
Me: “How does what work?”
Kevin: “How does getting it all transferred and stuff work?”
Me: “You buy the computer and pay them and they transfer it by 6…or so the guy said.”
Kevin: “Is that also true on the weekends or just for the weekdays?”
Me: “I don’t know, I never asked.”
Kevin: “Do we need an appointment?”
Me: “I have no idea…jeez you have a lot of questions!”
Kevin: “I’m not sure I can go on Saturday anyways.”
Me: “Maybe I should just go this afternoon. After all, if you’re just going to second guess me anyways, shouldn’t I just get started on that right away?”
Kevin: (huge sigh) “Oh Lynn, what are we going to do with you?”
So there you are! I rushed home to type of this post because I need to take my current computer apart and it’s absolutely possible that I will have fucked the entire thing up by tomorrow. If you’re reading this, then the entire situation went like clockwork but honestly, don’t count on that. This is just the type of situation that Kevin jinxes for me!
I’m just saying…
Hi Lynn – My computing days started with custom made home brew computer. Not my home, some one else in the local economy and like yourself I will -never- go back. Local computers are jerry built and usually come with little support and no warranty. I am now having an affair with a Dell. but I am jealous of your Apple. I’d like an Apple but the budget just doesn’t stretch far enough. Hope everything goes well with your file transfer and networking.
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No good deed goes unpunished…isn’t that what they say? Yeah, I’m excited by my Apple as I haven’t had one before but it just seemed like the thing to do. Thanks for commenting and I hope you come back!
What ARE we going to do with you… that’s a great one.
LOL.
Macs are evil. Sexy, yes, but evil. That is all.
I’m not planning on changing so I guess we aren’t going to do anything with me.
Hey Lynn, I read your post everyday! You are so funny!!!!! I love the conversations between you and Kevin (he’s a saint). Happy Anniversary! I have an apple computer now after years of using a Dell and love it. You will enjoy having everything Apple! Anyway, its super easy to download the – unfortunately not included- Microsoft Office for your new Apple computer! You can do it.
I have office and I’m having it installed so, not to worry Margaret, I’m not going anywhere! And thanks for reading
Congrats on YOUR anniversary!!
And, Lynn, I can honestly say that I’m the opposite of you on this one. I ask TOO many questions and my hubby barely any! But, he has put up with me for over 29 years!
Oh, and my sis-in-law has a MAC and LOVES it! But I never used one, so don’t have a clue about them, so I’m no help on that front. Good luck because I don’t want you not posting!
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Good for you…that’s how Kevin is. I’m a half assed kind of gal and it drives him nuts!
I’m totally OC and THAT drives my husband nuts, so I think that might make us even.
Pamela D Hart recently posted..Pam Please Dont
I’m just an all around pain in the ass
Since we are reading your words of wisdom today, I’m assuming all went like clockwork?
I have to confesss, I work in IT, but I am hugely inept when it comes to technology in my personal life. Don’t tell my boss, OK?
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It’s getting all souped up even as we speak
I’m a huge disliker of husbands who know it all, mine included. If I don’t write it down, it ain’t getting done or asked. Plain and simple, yo!
He’s not a know it all…he’s just an incredibly detail oriented person
Ah, you’re getting an Apple. One of us. One of us. One of us.
My very first computer, purchased before the dinosaur age, in 1984, was an Apple IIe. I loved it to pieces and it lasted me 8 years…but all of the “cool” games were for PC Only so I spent the next 10 years with various flavors of PCs…a “true blue” IBM, a setup that a friend made, a setup that a computer store made, etc. And I got virus after virus after virus. Went back to Mac about 6 years ago and have never been happier.
Hopefully you’ll transfer everything well and will be able to read this someday ;-)
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When I got my first job in 1982 I had an Apple but haven’t had one since but I do have kids with their MacBooks so I know they’re awesome. Can’t wait!
I made the transition to “Mac” a couple years ago. Having been a PCer, all games, all programs, networks, etc..
I’ve got a MBP – Mac Book Pro now, and to run some of the programs I need that are windows only, I loaded “Parallels” it allows Win programs to be run on a Mac. Now, I’ve got the best of both! and, didn’t have to buy 2 versions of msoffice ; )
Networking shouldn’t be a problem.
Enjoy!
Thanks…I’m really looking forward to it!
Happy Anniversary! (Is it too mean to say that I was 5 when you got married…maybe that is my way of getting back at you for teasing me with nice weather when I was stuck in the snow).
Hahaha…so funny! I could be your mom. Then you’d be as screwed up as my kids!
Lynn, I didn’t think this was possible! You always have command of a conversation, but Kevin? He took you down! :)
Craig keep pushing a Mac on me, too.
No way he took me down…most of our conversations are stupid and end with him scolding me or shaking his head!!!
Hahaha…I did get the computer though and pick it up soon
For years I’ve been telling ppl to go with a Mac. Nobody listens to me until after they get their “custom built” PC and find that it sucks dishwater. *sigh* I see u would have been no different. Believe me when I say you’re gonna love it. Maybe more than u do hubby. :-D happy Anniversary!
Hahaha…I was trying to be all nice but I’m psyched about my new Mac…better than my hubby huh?