This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which i Google Search


I know this isn’t much of a post but it totally cracked me up so I’m writing about it anyways.  I check my stats compulsively.  I really don’t know why because I honestly don’t do anything to change my stats such as submitting, or writing on big sites, or commenting or any of those things.



Nonetheless, I’m always curious where people come from and the like.  The other day I was checking my stats when I saw that somebody had done and Google Search for “tucker and turkey.”  Of course, “Tucker and the Turkey” is one of MY very favorite things I’ve ever written and I was a bit curious if THIS is what the person meant to find when they went looking for Tucker and turkey.


So, I did the Google Search myself and apparently at one point there was a Turkey named Tucker who was kind of a town pet.  Imagine my surprise.



And also, imagine the surprise of the person who was looking for a “pet” turkey and they stumbled upon the greatest sex-ed conversation EVER (at least in my opinion.)


They must have liked what they saw though because they stayed on the site for an hour.


Google Search kills me.  The stuff you can find.


For example, I Googled “how to rip someone’s heart out of their chest” (I know, I know) and what I found was downright disturbing.  You see, I thought it would be a useful skill in my post-apocalyptic skillset.  I’ve seen it on TV and it seems to be a useful thing to know how to do.



But WHAT I found was that some crazy Ultimate fighting dude, high on shrooms, had accidentally ripped the heart (and trust me, and whole lot more) out of someone’s chest.


This, of course, gave me great pause because as you know, I had planned on doing shrooms in the future to open up my mind (see here).  Now I am nervous that I’ll rip someone’s heart out of their chest.


Isn’t Google Search great?


I’m just saying …

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  1. Mayor Gia
    March 27, 2012

    Ha! I love checking out what people searched for getting to my site. LOTS of filthy stuff. I talk about masturbation like ONCE and it comes up allll the time, sheeeesh! Masturbation and popcorn and two of my bigger searches, actually.
    Mayor Gia recently posted..Dear Coworkers, Stop Sucking.My Profile

    • Lynn
      March 27, 2012

      what a combo huh?

  2. Jester Queen
    March 27, 2012

    Oh that’s quite the contrast!! But then, they wanted to talk turkey, so you never know. Maybe yours WAS the Turkey that they were looking for. The “see here” on your shroom plans didn’t have a link.

    • Lynn
      March 27, 2012

      oopps…better check it out

  3. Julie
    March 27, 2012

    After taking the shrooms, get on Pinterest for a while and then blog about it. THAT would be an interesting read!!

    • Lynn
      March 27, 2012

      yeah, who knows when i’ll actually do that

  4. Melanie
    March 27, 2012

    I obsessively check my stats too. I love how people come across my blog. And now I’m going to go read about the fighter that ripped someone’s heart out.

    • Lynn
      March 27, 2012

      isn’t that crazy? how did he get past the ribcage?

  5. Meredith P.
    March 27, 2012

    You are not alone in the obsessive stat checking department, I do it too… almost too much LOL. :)

    Google searches, can be all sorts of fun. One time my friend Googled her name and a link to a transvestite porn site came up! I laughed hysterically, she freaked out xD.
    Meredith P. recently posted..Are You Kidding Me!?!My Profile

    • Lynn
      March 27, 2012

      hahaha…i just burst out laughing at this

  6. ShirleyFai
    March 27, 2012

    Hi Lynn..I am actually addicted to google too…Even a single word I don’t know, i searched for it and look for the meaning and how it is used….And it is really helpful, as always…
    ShirleyFai recently posted..Controling Panic AttacksMy Profile

  7. Johnson15
    March 28, 2012

    Hi Lyn,
    Does Google search provide also you a huge benefits? Because it helps me in a lot of things, to find a quick and best answer in a single minute..
    Johnson15 recently posted..RSA online – Responsible Service Of AlcoholMy Profile

  8. Gina
    March 29, 2012

    Hi Lyn. Here is another way to rip someone’s heart out in case you like to have variety of techniques.

  9. Moran
    April 4, 2012

    I really enjoying reading your In which i discuss Shrooms post, lovely ideas that can relate in each of us here…
    Moran recently posted..Perte de poids pour un adolescentMy Profile

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