This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which i respond to a comment

I wanted to discuss something today that I’m very curious about.  Let me give you a little background here.  I wrote a post the other day, you can read it here, about how things were a little fucked up around my house.  Not in a bad way, just in a very chaotic end-of-the-year type way.  I was rambling on, as I tend to do, about what was going on and what I needed to do about it.  I then received the following comment on my blog:

 

…here we go again – blah-blah-blah-blah-blah!!!!!!!!

SERIOUSLY???????
WTH!!!!!

I never knew your children were – #1- Independently wealthy?????? – #2 – Over twenty one (otherwise recognized as adults) #3 – Your only tangible focus #4 – Fully self insured, self employed and not at all dependent on you for anything other than an occasional shoulder.

When will responsible, caring, supportive parents understand that wings are much more valuable than an “Andrew Jackson”? That the lesson in parenting is that the world does not, never should have, never truly will revolve around you or your child!
When you stop parenting with your head – rely only on what your heart guilts you into – your children lose!
No employer will hire a self absorbed, “mommy will do it for me”, I can have anything and everything I want – new hire. Not going to happen! Not today, not tomorrow not ever!!!!

This blog often just bores me – the humor is sick and the rambling – come on!!!!!!!!!

Didn’t I read just last week how inspired you were?

Get a map – plot with deliberateness – find your way back to what you truly have to offer.

Give your children the most self learned lesson that they will be forever grateful – the opportunity to earn what they want and value you contribution of caring!

 

Today, I wanted to address this comment. I rarely get comments from people not liking my blog.  I am more than aware that I am a polarizing person.  I always have been and I dare say that won’t change as I am now approaching 52.  People have always liked or truly disliked me.  I get it; I’m outspoken and abrasive with a very cynical, sarcastic sense of humor.  I’m also not the most approachable person at times so it’s no big surprise that people are scared of me.

 

Having said that, I’m a very supportive friend and often go out of my way for people.  I believe in charity and in random acts of kindness.  This blog is me, pure and simple, for better or worse.  I haven’t spent a lot of time and effort trying to get new readers and although I know I would like more, I’m too damn lazy to deal with it so I have a small amount of daily readers and some occasional people who stop by.

 

I normally print all my comments except the absolute spam ones which I send directly to trash.  The comment above surprised me on a number of levels and made me really think about the blogging process.  In real life, you know the one where you actually live, if you don’t like someone you normally just avoid them and stay away.  I personally have never felt compelled to walk up to someone and say “you know what, I just don’t like you.”  Since “liking” or “hating” someone is a personal opinion, who am I to ruin someone’s day just because they’re not “my cup of tea?”

 

I generally have a “live and let live attitude.” Your credos, your beliefs whether political or religious are YOUR beliefs.  As long as you don’t try to put them on me I’m fine with you therefore if I don’t feel like being exposed to you, I simply stay away.

 

Blogging is different however.  People feel free to say whatever the hell they want because they’re anonymous.  They don’t have to stand behind their words.  I would NEVER say anything in my blog that I didn’t stand behind in person. It’s just the way I am.

 

There are times when that can be uncomfortable but it’s unfair to attack someone on paper when you wouldn’t be able to do it in real life.  To me, it’s the ultimate chicken shit copout.

 

So back to the comment, if my blog is “boring” and my humor is “sick”, why would you ever read my blog?  It couldn’t be an accident because there is a huge disclaimer on the home page that says:

 

This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don’t have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

 

So really, you don’t like my blog then DON’T FUCKING READ IT! So that’s my first point.  My second point is that just the day before I had discussed kids being independent.  I was discussing putting my child on a plane to Greece for a “study abroad” program.  My other daughter is working on Washington, DC this summer as an intern, A PAID INTERN.  Therefore, I also don’t get where I pointed out that my kids were independently wealthy.

 

Third, I’m not sure that just because a child is 21 and a “legal adult” that your parenting duty automatically ends.  To be honest, I hope my kids need me as a parent way past that because I have learned a lot in my 51 years and I would love to be able to share it with them.  Obviously, they’ll make mistakes and learn lessons the hard way but sometimes, perhaps my experience can temper the blows they receive along the way.

 

I actually agree that no employer wants a whiney, self-absorbed kid which is why I have been endeavoring to make sure I don’t raise any.  At any rate, I just wanted to say that if you are going to critique another person on their blog at least make sure you have a clear gripe that people can identify because honestly, I’m not even sure what the hell the point of the comment was.

 

Am I too boring? Don’t read it…

Hate my sense of humor? Don’t read it…

Raising my children to be too dependent?  I’m pretty sure it’s the opposite….

Raising them to be too independent? Is that even possible…

Are my kids too wealthy? I refuse to apologize for the opportunities I’ve given them…they’ve worked their asses off and are incredibly successful in one of the best colleges in the country. Yes they’re lucky and they know it; it’s been drilled into them.

Do they think money grows on trees? They’ve always had summer jobs and worked so I’m pretty sure they know the value of a buck

Does their life revolve around me?  Do they even remember they have a mom…I wonder at times

Does my life revolve around them? It did for a long time.  It was the reason I became a Stay at Home Mom and now I’m trying to find out what I want to do, be it blogging, sculpting, painting or all of the above…

 

So there!  I just wanted to say that I don’t mind criticism and in fact, always print it but it needs to be clear, concise and perhaps a point would be nice somewhere in there.  You want to attack me?  Go right ahead but honestly, understand who I am and what I stand for first.

 

Ok, I’m done…normally these things don’t really affect me one-way or another but this one I felt like addressing.

 

I’m just saying…

 

 

 

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86 Comments

  1. Neeroc
    May 24, 2011

    That is one messed up comment. I haven’t been reading you for a long time, but got the opposite impression on just about every one of the points noted above.

    And 51? Damn.
    Neeroc recently posted..Dear vandals and the parents of vandalsMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      Thanks…I felt like I was teaching life skills too! Yep, almost 52 now. And thanks

  2. Kimberly
    May 24, 2011

    Amen! If they don’t want to read, they don’t have to read.

    That wasn’t so much a comment as an attack by a porcupine on PCP. Prickly. Scattered. Completely out of focus.

    And I for one can attest to your helpfulness. You didn’t have to help me. But you did. Graciously.
    Kimberly recently posted..Ratings and ReputationsMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      Thanks…I just didn’t get their point at all? Do I suck? Ok then, go away is my attitude. I was happy to help. Anytime.

  3. Tex
    May 24, 2011

    You tell ’em Lynn! Don’t read the freaking blog if you don’t like it! Simple as that….case closed:)

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      Well put! And with better language…hahaha

  4. cheerio
    May 24, 2011

    Please ignore that ignorant rant of a comment as it reeks of jealousy. IMO that if your daughter is planning to not communicate with you during her Greece trip (once she gets there) that is a sign of independence.
    Keep the honesty and the laughs coming.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      thanks…i really appreciate all the supportive comments i’ve gotten

  5. me
    May 24, 2011

    take that BIOTCHES!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Name *
      May 24, 2011

      my comment needs no moderation people! wtf?

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      hahaha..Amanda, you are awesome!

  6. Don E. Chute
    May 24, 2011

    First off let me say I read it, and I wholeheartedly agree. Your opening disclaimer indeed says it all, but if your me, it magnetizes me to read.

    As a blogger and even before that…It takes effort to put ones thoughts and feelings on paper, err, on digital paper. Most times all of us would be better off [as I taught my kids] to keep your thoughts in your head, until your SURE you want to launch them.

    In the normal world, if someone wants to share themselves with you, you know who they are! That being said…

    …anyone who comments anonymously, is a low form of pond scum. Surely not comfortable in they’re own skin. Like the grade schooler who passes ‘a note’ all around the class so that when the intended person opens it and reads “your ugly”, they have no idea who done it.

    I think your okeedoughkee! and I’m not afraid to let you know where I live.

    Aloha From Sunny South Florida!
    p.s. We should meet. Folks say that I’m opinionated, outspoken, abrasive, etc. I stop them at cynical though cause I call that…just being honest! But let’s face it, you havent’ really done all those things until your blog is banned in China!
    Don E. Chute recently posted..GAGA FOR GAGAMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      thanks for the comment…i can’t remember the last time i was in Florida so not sure about meeting but come on up here.

  7. Jenn
    May 24, 2011

    Wow, it appears that someone woke up with their cranky pants on and chose to shit all over you. The comment makes no sense and ridiculous.

    Productive commenting is what makes blogging so interesting. Productive . . . not insulting. No on has to agree with me but they damn well better respectivly agree to disagree or they will be deleted.

    Ultimately, the comment is not worth your time beyond being fodder for an interesting post.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      agreed

  8. Name *
    May 24, 2011

    Obviously that fool has no contact with people in the real world and must channel all his aggression and idiocy into nasty and unsavory comments in his anonymous cyber world. He probably has 10 cats, 4 computers, a wicked online gaming addiction and a blow up doll collection. Don’t let him get to you, and don’t ever let anyone tell you that you are not a good parent.

    Cheers.
    VB
    Name * recently posted..Swimsuit Shopping Part One- The Gray HairMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      not to worry…i don’t let anybody else define because because very frankly, i’m too old for those games

  9. Cynthia Parrott
    May 24, 2011

    I love your blogs…they are real thoughts about real life from a real person! The thing about life is: it’s all trial and error and we hope and pray everyday that we do our best for ourselves, our children and others…And it’s perfectly ok to one day be inspired and blog about it and the next day feel like the proverbial rug has been pulled out from beneath our feet and blog about that, too.
    It’s a personal choice to click on your blog and read it OR NOT! DOn’t like it, don’t read it!
    Keep going. Lynn. You are an inspiration :)

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      thank you…i don’t think i do anything special, i just admit to all my faults. well, most of them at least

  10. Margaret
    May 24, 2011

    Lynn, whenever there is a meanspirited sideline critic, this quote always comes to mind and helps me through…

    “It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.”
    “Citizenship in a Republic,”
Speech at the Sorbonne, Paris, April 23, 1910

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      great quote Margaret…and thanks

  11. Lady Estrogen
    May 24, 2011

    WTH? Yes, to that feckin’ weirdo.
    Loved your responses. Your disclaimer sounds an awful lot like mine as well. HAHA…
    Don’t like this? Don’t read it! Simple.
    Wow.
    Funny if they keep coming back to read more… and read this. I wouldn’t be surprised.
    Lady Estrogen recently posted..Hello- Hello MondayMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      hahaha…who knows if she’ll come back…i don’t mind criticism…just let it be coherent

  12. Katja Brown
    May 24, 2011

    I definitely agree with your “live and let live attitude.” I also agree with the fact that people should not read your blog if they don’t like it. For the rest of us it is entertaining and I actually miss your blog on Saturdays and Sundays …

    The deeper question here is why do people think that it is o.K. to attack you for your opinions? Do they want to establish some kind of superiority? I just don’t get it …

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      well, who am i to judge the world. I just do what i do…

      • Katja Brown
        May 24, 2011

        Very clever reply Lynn!

        • Lynn
          May 24, 2011

          thanks

  13. karen
    May 24, 2011

    I’ll just say this person seems to be the definition of a Bitch Pigeon. What’s a bitch pigeon you ask? It’s a person who just flies by and shits on your life before flying away again.

    Not worth your time or effort, babe. Shake em off. They don’t like what u have to say, they don’t have to read it. I feel the same about my blog – don’t like what I have to say, don’t read it!

    Karen

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      hahaha…never heard of a bitch pigeon before. Hilarious..and thanks

  14. raquel
    May 24, 2011

    I just agree that if you don’t like something…don’t read it. It makes no sense if you find something despicable that you would return and return to it? Unless you secretly enjoy it.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      i know…i don’t read things i don’t enjoy. Even books…if i hate them i just stop reading. Life’s to short to make yourself miserable.

  15. Donna
    May 24, 2011

    OMG. What the hell is wrong with people anymore. I read blogs that sometimes I don’t like, but I don’t comment and say mean things, I just breeze on by.

    And being a parent NEVER EVER ENDS. I thought when my kids left home it would be easier. Nope, they still come to you with problems, just harder, more grown up ones.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      I think most people don’t comment on stuff they hate but if they did, a point would be awesome

  16. Cat
    May 24, 2011

    I got my first bloggy troll comment last week! It was exhilarating. And, of course, it was “anonymous”. PUSSY!

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      hahaha…that’s funny. So you were excited?

  17. Alexandra
    May 24, 2011

    Lynn, there will always be people like this in the world. The internet makes it easier for them to mouthvomit.

    I had a comment last week saying that I made up my posts and I did it all to look cute but actually anyone could tell they’re all lies.

    Nice.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      Well, you do look cute so … just kidding. How could people think you make your stuff up? It’s all real life stuff…people are bozos sometimes

  18. NotJustAnotherJennifer
    May 24, 2011

    Ummmm, yeah, what was the point? Did that person just need to rant and you happened to be in their way? If they read you often, they should know you. If they don’t, why do they care enough to comment? Rude….

  19. Alison@Mama Wants This
    May 24, 2011

    I read that comment and thought she must be on drugs or something. She was incoherent, rambling and just plain shitty. I’m glad you addressed this, because it needed to be addressed. Good on you for standing up for yourself.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      Thanks…normally I ignore stuff but I didn’t want to in this case.

  20. Redshoes51
    May 24, 2011

    Wow… that was some comment… someone must have pissed in his/her wheaties…

    Like you, I am of the opinion that I will ALWAYS be the Father of my kids… and need to be a Father to them…

    All in all, you posted a great counter-comment… now go to that person’s blog and leave a similar comment! HAR!

    ~shoes~

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      She didn’t put down a blog so there was no recourse. But I wouldn’t do that anyways. I usually try to take the high road.

  21. Pamela D Hart
    May 24, 2011

    I read that “rant “and those type of people don’t ever leave links so you can find them…they are cowards. This is your blog so of course it’s about you…duh. Not only is she bitter and jealous, she’s also as dumb as a bag of hammers.
    Pamela D Hart recently posted..Just Meno-STOP Already!My Profile

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      hahaha…yep, that’s why i wrote my response

  22. angelicalangie
    May 24, 2011

    BWAHAHAHAHA ok I will try and give a rational comment here … BWAHAHAHAHA.

    Sorry just imagining what a bitch pigeon looks like. Not having read the comment other than the quoted excerpt I have two things to say; what a fucking twat and who the fuck pissed on their bitchflakes!

    The one thing I have adored is the reality of the articles you have written, how you have “kicked the baby bird outta the nest” twice and have seen them both flourish! Yeah, you are there to bail them out – but I doubt they will ever need it. I have also read about how there is a ray of light to an Autism diagnosis – it normalised it to me when my besties (read sister but born to different parents lol) son was diagnosed. It gave me the strength to support her in that! At the moment we don’t know where specifically he falls in the spectrum (he isn’t even 4) but you have given plenty of hope that ANYTHING is possible

    This person, you know the ejit who left the comment, is so far removed from reality they need to get back in touch.

    Ignore them – your doing an outstanding job on showing mothers as three dimensional people instead of being ‘just mom’

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      thanks so much angel..i really appreciate it. Hope you’re having a great day

  23. Margaret
    May 24, 2011

    Wow. This must mean that you’ve made it to the big-time, Lynn. I don’t understand shitty comments from people who have a tick in their knickers–why the hell does someone leave such a crap comment if their so disgusted with the way they perceive your life as presented here on your blog? It’s a BLOG. One that I read faithfully (via RSS. I’m not a good commenter) and I enjoy your writing and your perspective. And seeing as we’re looking to relocate to the Raleigh/Durham area, it sort of makes me smile to know there are normal folk that live there (yes, I know, I just classified you as ‘normal’ That should give you a sense of what I’m like. Heh) Life in the hills of New Hampshire (at least in the cultish area I live) ain’t all it’s cracked up to be. :)
    Margaret recently posted..Buy the Book- 101 Success Secrets for Gifted KidsMy Profile

    • Margaret
      May 24, 2011

      and that’s “they’re” not “their”. D’oh.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      first, thanks for reading the blog. Second, i’m not so sure i made it to the big time but i certainly must have provoked somebody i guess. I love NC btw and there are tons of normal people down here.

  24. Sarah Hague
    May 24, 2011

    I feel you could use these comments to enter into an email exchange. Have you heard of David Thorne? He has a crazy website where he responds to emails he gets with wit and sarcasm and has gained a huge following. Try reading http://www.27bslash6.com/

    I think you will appreciate his style.

    Use your trolls, they are a bottomless source of fun.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      yeah, i love David Thorne but i’m not so sure i could do what he does. He is awesome though.

  25. FranceRants
    May 24, 2011

    Oooo.. maybe you are the Howard Stern of the blogging world?

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      hahaha…and how’s that?

      • FranceRants
        May 24, 2011

        Because some people are always complaining about Howard Stern. How do they know to complain about him if they don’t listen to him, and why listen to him if they are offended by him?

        • Lynn
          May 24, 2011

          good point…hahaha

  26. Leigh Ann
    May 24, 2011

    Lynn, my favorite quote ever is from Andy Warhol: “Don’t pay any attention to what they write about you. Just measure it in inches.”

    That was a loooooong comment, my friend. :)

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      that’s too funny…of course, maybe she was just kind of wordy

  27. I had so much to say but am now so hung up on Bitch Pigeon that the rest has escaped me! You had better road trip it up to TypeA for a cocktail, otherwise you will blush at the rant I will leave here on your site!

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      hahaha…i’m hoping too…i mean, keeping up with you is impossible but i’m hoping to run up there

  28. Cathryn Louis
    May 24, 2011

    How rude – can’t believe she did that. Maybe she’s jealous of your success ;)

    I cannot tell you how many blogs I’ve visited and don’t like. You know why? Because I’ve never visited them again and – consequently – have forgotten about them.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      You and me both…if i don’t like them, i don’t go back. Thanks for visiting here though

  29. Not a Perfect Mom
    May 24, 2011

    anonymous commenters need to grow a pair…really..what’s the point? if you really disagree with me then don’t be a bitch about it…

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      i totally agree with you

  30. Jessica
    May 24, 2011

    I know we already talked about this on Twitter but I think if people don’t like what you have to say then why do they spend time reading and commenting. I don’t get it. Anyway, I love your blog and that is all that matters.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      indeed Jessica, that’s all that matters

  31. Name *
    May 24, 2011

    Maple Syrup is made by boiling tree sap at a ratio of 10 to 1.
    People should really stay relevant when commenting.
    I’m just saying…
    Some wise woman once said that.
    Life is short.
    Fuck the assholes.
    Your faithful follower.

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      Hahahaha…thanks my faithful follower

  32. Name *
    May 24, 2011

    Sorry, I didn’t provide my name (Sarah) or my (boring as all get out, avenue for updating my family on my childrens bowel movements) blog (journeysofthezoo.blogspot.com).

    • Lynn
      May 24, 2011

      Thanks SArah….I always wondered what the maple syrup ratio …now i know

  33. Casey Freeland
    May 28, 2011

    Phew! That’s something else. The thing that strikes me is what people will say online that they won’t say in person. This is true for blogs as well as comments after news articles on sites like Yahoo. It’s just rude.

    There may be exceptions, but I can’t imagine this guy calling you up on the phone and laying this out. One could argue that he’s just being honest, just using a forum where societal restrictions don’t exist to tell it like it is.

    But I think the opposite is true. I believe that because we are communicating with only text, which is something like 10% of the whole of our self-expression tool box, we have to be extra careful with what we say if we are to be properly understood.

    Unfortunately, that is a minority opinion as evidenced by this comment.

    Take care. Love your blog.

    Casey

    • Lynn
      May 28, 2011

      thanks so much Casey and thanks for always being such an avid supporter of my blog..

  34. Alisha Jaybird
    May 29, 2011

    People are such a$$hats. And the thing that gets me from the haters on people’s blogs… WHY in the HAYELL are you reading/following if you can’t stand what you read?! And YOU want to hate on people and tell them what for and how to live their lives when OBVIOUSLY YOU are the one with skewed priorities wasting your valuable time telling people what crapheads you think they are. Who’s got the problems again?! Um… I’m still thinking you. Go read a book, watch some stupid reality TV, find a life, or buy some lotion. Get a hobby or you’re going to make a nice hood ornament someday when you piss the wrong person off.

    Sorry… soapbox. You da bomb, Lynn. Sorry for the haters. Keep telling it like it is.
    Alisha Jaybird recently posted..Life in BulletsMy Profile

    • Lynn
      May 29, 2011

      Thanks so much for being a supporter. I really appreciate it!

  35. Julie Vaughn
    May 30, 2011

    I don’t think you are cynical or sarcastic. I don’t think you deserved that comment. Some of us have no one and are jealous. I’m sure that was the motivation behind it. Meanness out of spite. Not because of content. Best to you.

    • Lynn
      May 30, 2011

      yeah…i am a bit cynical and certainly you might not agree with my methodology although i feel the results speak for themselves. At any rate, i don’t mind people disagreeing with me. I just felt that if they didn’t like it certainly, they shouldn’t read it.

  36. julia Vaughn
    May 30, 2011

    People need their parents alot more when they are out in this fucked up world than when they are home and safe.

    • Lynn
      May 30, 2011

      agreed…i wish mine were still around

  37. Julie Bernucci
    May 30, 2011

    I think a man wrote that comment. Some of them are such fucked up know-it-alls.
    I love you for telling him to fuck off.

    • Lynn
      May 30, 2011

      hmmm…maybe…i just didn’t think it was a very clear criticism…AT ALL

  38. RCB
    May 30, 2011

    The nerve that some people have to take all of their frustrations out on you without (1) doing it to your face, which would be the civilized way, and (2) knowing who you really are. We barely kno ourselves. How do they expect to know what you stand for? It’s like when you’re throwing a party and you’re trying your very best to do a good job, and you ARE doing a good job, and there’s always someone who I suppose is unhappy with their own life they feel the urge to complain behind your back about how you are doing things all wrong. But they keep coming to your parties or, in your case, read your blog again and again and again…

    Best,
    Randy

    • Lynn
      May 30, 2011

      yeah…i know you can’t please all the people but if you don’t like it, don’t read it, ya know?

  39. RCB
    May 30, 2011

    P.S. Sorry for the type-o, Lynn. That always happens when someone really irritates me :)

    • Lynn
      May 30, 2011

      no worries….i always have typos

  40. PiggyinManolos
    May 31, 2011

    Sometimes, a douche is just a douche….they’re just pissy nobody reads their blog…..

    • Lynn
      May 31, 2011

      hahaha…yeah, sometimes

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