This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which i shot myself in the foot…one conversation at a time

 

I see that EVERYONE has written their BlogHer recap and gone on and on about all the AWESOMENESS.  I have decided to take a different approach and talk about the MANY times that I shot myself in the foot with my unique conversational approaches.  Poor Nicole, my BlogHer buddy and good friend, spent much time trying to keep my mouth shut to no avail.  Hope you enjoy them.

 

So, I was outside on a bench talking to a woman about a blog redesign:

 

Her:                 Have you ever heard of so and so? (Gives me the name of a company)

Me:                 Oh yes.  They don’t know their ass from a hole in the ground. Why?

Her:                 They’re my partners.

Me:                 Hahahaha

Nicole:            (shaking head sadly again at my mouth)

 

This one happened when I sat down at a table full of people I didn’t know!

 

Me:                 So your website is “Christy Comes”? Wow, what do you blog about? Sex?

Christy:           No, my name is Christy Comes pronounced co-mays.

Me:                 Really?

Christy:           Yes, that’s NOT MY WEBSITE, it’s my NAME!

Me:                 oh, well this is awkward!

 

This one happened when I met a producer from ABC in New York:

 

Me:                 So you work for ABC?  Excellent.  Would you like to hire my daughter?

Teri:                 We have internships.

Me:                 No, she will actually be graduating and will need a real job.

Teri:                 We have a hiring freeze.

Me:                 That’s ok! She won’t graduate until May. I’m sure the timing will be perfect for both of you.  Shall I consider it a done deal?

 

And during PathFinders day when I was asked what I thought of the session:

 

Person:           So…what did you think of that session?

Me:                 I thought it was incredibly boring

Person:           Really?

Me:                 Yeah

Person:           Well, I work for BlogHer, would you elaborate on that?

Me:                 Oh shit…I did it again!

And a conversation regarding a session:

 

Nicole:            Should we go to the panel on Blogging your way to self-esteem?

Me:                 No, I’m already swimming in self-esteem.

Nicole:            What?

Me:                 Yeah, Andie already says I have too much.  I can’t afford anymore!

Nicole:            So, what should we do?

Me:                 Let’s go to the pool and drink!

 

Also, an excellent text that i sent to my partner in crime, Nicole Morgan, who I was supposed to meet at 8:00 for breakfast and a “welcome to BlogHer” speech.

 

Aug 5, 2011 7:03

So it’s another welcome after breakfast and I already feel welcome so I’ll show up around 10 or so

So, there you are!  That was basically my BlogHer conference; me saying stuff and then having to clean up the mess.  Hope you enjoyed it!

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52 Comments

  1. Trinh
    August 11, 2011

    Still chuckling! Hope you found out about adding buttons in the comment section. Would love just to click…agree, disagree, funny, really funny, uh–not so funny, etc.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      hahaha..oh? never thought about a button like that…i’ll have to check it out

  2. By Word of Mouth Musings
    August 11, 2011

    Don’t let her fool you – she made excellent contacts while she was there!
    How you may ask?
    Because she is real and true, honest (sometimes brutally so) gives compliments where they are due (yes, due, mull that one over) and has genuine interest in the things that really matter … in spite of needing a minder for most of the time there!

    altho I did rather enjoy being introduced as the nicest person she knows ;)

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Nicole! Don’t make me look like a decent person. That’ll screw up my reputation. You are the nicest person (with a bit of snark added in…that’s WHY i LOVE YOU). I do need a minder.

      LOTS OF LOVE TO YOU

  3. Missy | The Literal Mom
    August 11, 2011

    These are totally hilarious! Thanks for making me laugh.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Thanks…I spend my LIFE extricating myself from the messes I get in! Thanks for the comment

  4. Stephanie
    August 11, 2011

    too funny! I needed a good laugh

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      you’re welcome!

  5. Julie
    August 11, 2011

    Just thought you’d get a kick out of this one ~ I recently had foot surgery. When telling my boss, he asked if I was having it permanently removed from my mouth.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      hee hee…i’d probably have the same surgery

  6. Theresa
    August 11, 2011

    Open mouth insert foot lol

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      should be my byline

  7. Stephanie
    August 11, 2011

    Well, at least you are laughing at your blunders :) And I think sleeping in is better than breakfast at 8 am. I could have that at home! Drinks by the pool is also a great idea, don’t see how that translates to foot in the mouth.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      not that particular statement…but there’s plenty i didn’t put it

  8. MommaKiss
    August 11, 2011

    brutal honesty is the only way I roll. perfect.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Agreed!!!

  9. ChiMomWriter
    August 11, 2011

    I laughed every time I was around you. Not polite chuckles. Real, big laughs. For that, I thank you!

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      We had fun, didn’t we? Thanks for being so awesome to be with

  10. Leigh Ann
    August 11, 2011

    Classic. This world needs honestly like yours. And I’m sure blog conferences need them too.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Well, I don’t have a filter

  11. Name *
    August 11, 2011

    This is priceless. And I love that you are you (and you are fabulous) and make no apologies for speaking your mind!

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Thanks…I love you too

  12. Name *
    August 11, 2011

    We all have our foot in the mouth stories about BlogHer, Lynn, you’re the only one swimming in enough self esteem to tell them!

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Either that or I have absolutely no sense of embarrassment

  13. @ColoradoMom
    August 11, 2011

    I wish I would have made more time to just sit and listen to the 2 of you. You guys crack me up every.single.conference! LOVE! :)

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      We did seem to have a lot of laughs…the alcohol didn’t hurt either

  14. Jennifer
    August 11, 2011

    I was standing in front of that Twizzlers bridge thing when someone asked if I wanted my photo taken in front of it and I responded, “oh no, that sounds kind of lame.” And she says, “oh… well… will you take mine?” First day there. Lovely.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Well, that Twizzlers bridge was a constructional marvel, you know? I love those awkward situations

  15. Redshoes51
    August 11, 2011

    Evidently you find this to be quite a way to start conversations with others…

    HAR!!!

    ~shoes~

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Well, I say whatever and some people respond and some people don’t … No matter

  16. Well let me just say that talking to you was REFRESHING! It was great meeting you!

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Thanks…I enjoyed meeting you too

  17. RCB
    August 11, 2011

    Hahahaha! I’m having dinner now but the food that used to be in my mouth is all over my keyboard now! Thank you for that! Too funny! All I have to say, Lynn, is OOOPS!

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Sorry about that! But not really sorry….hahaha

  18. Suzy
    August 11, 2011

    If more people blogged like this, I’d go back to reading them.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      hahaha…that’s pretty funny

  19. vanita
    August 11, 2011

    Blogher recaps . . . I usually stay away from those posts. It leaves me depressed. But, BUT! Since you wrote this one Lynn, I had to stop by and GOD my sides hurt from the laughing. You craack me up lady. this was wonderful. Thank you for sharing.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      I’m glad you enjoyed it…yeah, i had fun. It wasn’t about the whole “blogging” sisterhood for me, it was about having a good time with people

  20. Tazer Warrior Princess
    August 11, 2011

    OH jeez I do this all the time, and half the time it’s not even my fault.

    The other day:
    “Oh he must be relocating”
    Coworker:
    “Uh… did you just say he’s really gay?”
    Me:
    “Uhhhhhhhhhhh…. oops?”

    And the guy I was speaking to, is in fact, really gay. So it was double awkward.

    • Lynn
      August 11, 2011

      Hahaha…how in the world did they mix that up?

  21. Name *
    August 11, 2011

    As your newest follower, I have to say, I wish I had known about this whole blogher thing as I totally would have gone, assuming it was budgeted into my disposable income…assuming I ever have any disposable income…I’m getting off track here. Blogher. Sounds like it would have been a blast with people like you in attendance.

    • Lynn
      August 12, 2011

      Perhaps next time…

  22. Lady Estrogen
    August 12, 2011

    Hahaha – LOVE the Re-design and the Christy Comes – OH MY – I just love you for those :)

    I’ve been purposely avoided all fucking BlogHer recaps, but only you would make be break my own rule.

    And yes, I don’t think I need any more self-esteem – my Hubs would think my head would pop off soon.

    x

    • Lynn
      August 12, 2011

      you would have died if you had been there with the “christy comes” thing. The redesign was in direct response to a session where they talked about Landing pages and i realized that although i was getting tons of hits, i wasn’t getting ANY followers.

      You def don’t need more self esteem. At some point we will meet. See, with you? the christy comes thing would’ve been a blog name

  23. rdb
    August 12, 2011

    HAHAHA!!!

    • Lynn
      August 12, 2011

      are you back? you’re alive…gotta see you

  24. Rizzy
    August 12, 2011

    To hilarious!!
    Christy Comes!!
    I’m totally following you :)

    • Lynn
      August 12, 2011

      Thanks…and welcome aboard

  25. Kirsty (Shamozal)
    August 14, 2011

    I’ll meet you by the pool at Blogher12! I love a bit of honesty.

    Kxx

    • Lynn
      August 14, 2011

      excellent…hopefully i can be there.

  26. Lela
    August 14, 2011

    Well, I thought you were lovely. Could be because I make the same mistakes. I just don’t give a fook.

    • Lynn
      August 15, 2011

      I enjoyed meeting you too! Any friend of Nicoles is a friend of mine

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