This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!
I live in a house with a huge meadow across the street from me. In front of the fence of the huge meadow is a tree: a big, beautiful black walnut tree. Every year Kevin and I breathe a sigh of relief that it’s alive because these trees aren’t that common. Each spring we get excited when the leaves come out and the squirrels love the nuts and Tucker loves to chase squirrels so the tree is always a cause for excitement.
Today, when I drove into the neighborhood after working out, there was a man under the tree picking up walnuts and placing them into a large box. Now walnuts are huge, especially black walnuts. They’re also messy and all over the place.
I got Tucker and we went outside to talk to him about what he was up to and he explained that he wanted to make some “black walnut” ice cream from the nuts and that it was delicious. I asked him how you prepared the nuts and honestly, it’s apparently a tedious and messy process.
He then explained that he also wanted to plant some seeds in his back yard so he could have his own walnut tree.
Me: so you want to grow your own tree?
Him: yep, in my backyard
Me: and where do you live?
Him: about two blocks from here?
Me: in this neighborhood?
Him: yes, I live in this neighborhood
(Oh shit moment number one)
Me: what street?
Him: (he tells me the street)
Me: down on the right?
Him: no, the second house on the left
(Now I’m puzzled. I know the person who lives in that house)
Me: are you Cindy’s husband?
Him: yes Lynn, I am
(Oh shit moment number two)
… and then I cringed because I do this shit ALL THE TIME. I meet people and then I can’t recognize them outside their surroundings. In this case, he and his wife walk their dog past my house. Normally, I just see her and I haven’t really ever seen him without her … except at neighborhood parties and meetings but then I’m either drinking or not paying attention or both.
So … that was embarrassing. But I did learn another interesting fact. Apparently that awesome black walnut tree outside my house is worth a hell of a lot of money for the wood and the furniture business.
I also learned that I suck with playing along with situations and I can’t hide my ignorance worth a damn. But then, you knew that didn’t you???