This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which i was paranoid

Lost and Confused Signpost

This morning I was running late because I stayed up late last night to watch Duke win it’s 5th National Men’s Basketball Championship. Yeah, I know there’s a lot of “Duke haters” out there but I’ve had 3 kids go to Duke and now ones in Med School there so I’m obviously a fan.


I was happy for Daniel (and of course, the men’s basketball team) because Keely and Andie were both there when they won in 2010 and it’s exciting to be a student when they win.


Anyways, I stayed up so late watching all the post game stuff that I didn’t get up for my spin class this morning and I was running late. Yes, that’s what that ENTIRE explanation was about.


So I was driving to the gym when I see a police car parked on a side street. The speed limit on Lawndale is 35 and I checked to see that I wasn’t speeding (I wasn’t) but also I remembered that I got pulled last year and I wasn’t speeding then either. Last year, my stupid little sticker had expired by ONE DAY and I got a ticket for driving with an expired registration.


Coincidentally, my registration expired March 31 and there is a two-week grace period and I was worried that I would get another ticket today. I made sure that I was going slowly but sure enough, the cop pulled out two cars behind me.


“Shit,” I thought, “I’m going to get another ticket!” The cop was following two cars behind and I was trying to stay calm and then in about a half a mile he pulled the poor son of a bitch behind me.


What a sigh of relief! Also, why do cops make us all so paranoid? Also, I need to get my car inspected so that I can get my registration done.


Actually my car, Kevin’s car and Daniel’s car are all due for inspections but I have no control over those two.


Anyways, I was way too tired for that.


Speaking of too tired, yesterday I drove Keely to the airport at 6:00 AM and I hadn’t yet had coffee. On the way out of the airports there’s all these veer lefts and veer rights and forks in the road and all that sort of shit.


Of course, I go to the airport all the time so I basically know what I’m doing but I was so tired that I guess I just followed the car in front of me. All of a sudden I look up and I’m at the gigantic FedEx facility. What the fuck?


Apparently I was so spaced that I got off of Bryan Boulevard and ended up on a side road. I did a U-turn (illegally I might say) and then entered the highway although I wasn’t quite sure it was in the right direction.


Turns out it was and I made it home but I have never done that before. Moral of the story: coffee is crucial. Also don’t go to the airport early. Also, well I suppose that’s it.


See ya!

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  1. Sheri
    April 8, 2015

    Love hearing about your life–so different from mine and yet so many of your reactions are so similar to mine. Keep writing, please.

    • Lynn
      April 10, 2015

      It is funny how people aRe people no matter how or where they live!

  2. dasein1216
    April 10, 2015

    My ex wife got pulled over TWICE for entering an intersection on a yellow light. In both cases the cop told her that the yellow light was meant to warn you not to enter the intersection, it was not meant to warn you not to go through it. Maybe this is so, but if it is it’s the most under-enforced law ever. Hell, 99 times out of 100 they don’t enforce not entering an intersection when the damn light’s red. I suspect that in both cases someone was assigned a citation quota and my ex happened to come along while it was being filled. There are good reasons to have a certain amount of paranoia around cops… this is not to say that they aren’t out there putting their lives on the line etc etc, but the reasons are there, and legitimate.

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