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In which i’m an idiot

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I’m such an idiot. Here’s why.


So we have these two couches in our living room and I really like them but they have feathers in them. That’s not why I’m an idiot though.


At any rate, they’re a few years old so while the couch is completely fine the cushions sag in the middle. That’s because all of us seem to sit in certain places so they’re basically “squashed feathers.”


So I was talking to a friend about the sag in the middle of my couch and they told me to just add more feathers.


I’m so stupid huh? Never thought of that by myself. So I looked on the Internet and I read an article explained the difference between “feathers” and “down” and I decided I’d order down. Apparently down lasts longer and to me, longer is good.


I read that you basically just need to add “down” to wherever you want it fluffier because over time they smash down. The “down” doesn’t squash as much as the feathers though.


I figure “I can do that” and discuss it with Kevin and we order 4 pounds of down.


All good so far.


I get the down and I go to unzip the slip cover and inside is the cushion which also has a zipper. I check it out and I’m psyched to add the down.


I unzip the cushion and what the fuck? Inside is a 4-inch piece of foam running the entire length and there’s down on each side but the down is SEWN INTO a pocket in the cushion.


In other words, it’s THERE. ITS SMUSHED and I CAN’T access it. I had no idea that it would be sewn into the sides of the cushion. I mean, I’m not surprised it’s sewn in, I just thought there would be a zipper.


So now I have 4 pounds of down, no access so to experiment Kevin and I stuffed pillows into the cushion to see if that was better (it was.)


Now, according to my friend, I’ll need to bring the WHOLE DAMN THING to an upholsterer who can add the down.


Or I can just find some pillow covers that are the right size and add the down and then stuff that into the cushion.


Either way my “quick fix” is fucked up and THAT’S why I’m an idiot.
Well, that and many other things. Ugh…why is stuff so complicated?

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One Comment

  1. dasein1216
    May 28, 2015

    You’re not an idiot, you’re the victim of planned obsolescence- you know, when things are designed to go wrong after a certain period of time so that you’ll HAVE to buy something to fix it. You can’t fix it yourself; that’s part of the plot. Chalk it up to being a victim and go on to the next time.

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