This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which i’m the grim reaper

Grim Reaper

I was having a conversation the other day (that seems to be a common theme on this blog) and I was explaining the following:


Me:                  I think that I would be an awesome Grim Reaper


Other:             Grim Reaper?


Me:                  yeah, you know.  The guy who is death


Other:             Does the Grim Reaper even exist?


Me:                  Of course it does.  Haven’t you seen “meet Joe Black” with Brad Pitt?


Other:             I’m not sure it’s real…


Me:                  sheesh… anyways, I think I’d look awesome as the Grim Reaper


Other:             How’s that?


Me:                  Well, first I look really good in black …


Other:             Black?


Me:                  Yeah BLACK.  The grim reaper wears a huge black robe and I look good in black.


Other:             What else?


Me:                  The Grim Reaper carries around a scythe…


Other:             A scythe?


Me:                  Yeah, how SICK is that?  Soooo awesome


Other:             What does he do with the scythe?


Me:                  How the hell should I know?  Perhaps he just mows down lives…


Other:             What else?


Me:                  I think I’d be good at culling people


Other:             Why do you say that?


Me:                  I’m always good at getting rid of clutter so I’d just basically unclutter the world.


Other:             Who would you get rid of?


Me:                  First of all.  I’d get rid of stupid people.


Other:             okayyyyyy


Me:                  … and ignorant and annoying people as well.  Just your basic superfluous person.  GONE!!


Other:             wouldn’t you feel guilty?


Me:                  I assume that once you’re actually the Grim Reaper you wouldn’t have a guilty conscience.  The ability to smote people down without guilt has GOT to be in the job description, don’t cha think?


Other:             I’m not sure that there is an actual job description.


Me:                  You know, you suck at these types of conversations.



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  1. Vicki Sensabaugh
    July 7, 2011

    I think you would make a GREAT Grim Reaper! Black = Good Color .. Scythe = ‘SICK’ .. Less Human Clutter = For it! .. And lastly – Of course you lose your guilty conscience when you land the job (it’s in the contract) .. =) Who would have thought DEATH would make my morning !

    • Lynn
      July 7, 2011

      i know right? it would be awesome. Except in the summer i suppose. That would be hot

  2. Name *
    July 7, 2011

    scythe…it to em…scythe…it to em…scythe…it to em…!

    Oh shit the ‘Laugh In’ thing again…

    Aloha From Sunny South Florida!

    • Lynn
      July 7, 2011

      hahaha…laugh in.

      Hello Don! How’s it going?

  3. Lady Estrogen
    July 7, 2011

    Perhaps he just mows down lives…
    Oh, Lynn, you crack me up.

    OF COURSE you would want the job because of the weapon – of cooooourse.

    • Lynn
      July 7, 2011

      wouldn’t you want that job?

  4. Julie
    July 7, 2011

    Let me know if you want a copy of my list of stupid people. You can thin the herd here in the Northern Chicago ‘burbs.

    • Lynn
      July 7, 2011

      sure…as soon as i get the job you can send me the list

  5. Pamela D Hart
    July 7, 2011

    Let me know if you need a reference! Oh and I have a list of people to mow…it’s fairly long, but I don’t think the Grimster sleeps and probably doesn’t get hot either. ;-)

    • Lynn
      July 7, 2011

      I hope he doesn’t get hot. I live in NC and black in summer would be very warm

  6. RCB
    July 7, 2011

    Well I’d better say something smart now before you show me your big … er … scyth … er … scyth … shit! how do you spell that word! … scythe, yeah that’s it. (I think.)


    • Lynn
      July 7, 2011

      Don’t forget the e! Scythe I believe. Hahahah…thanks for being such a faithful reader

  7. Kathleen
    July 7, 2011

    read the book The Book Thief by Markus Zusak!! one of my favs. narrated by the grim reaper

    • Lynn
      July 7, 2011

      Hahaha…I read this to Andie who said “that’s Kathleens fav book” and then I looked and it was you!!! Awesome

      I’m now going to get that book

      • kathleen
        July 8, 2011

        YAY then we can talk about the k/l comparisons between liesel and rudy!!!!

        • Lynn
          July 9, 2011

          Ok… I’ll get it today!

  8. raisel
    July 9, 2011

    Would you need an assistant? I’d like to be of service because there are sooooo many stupid and ignorant people, you’d be incredibly busy. And it might be important to make a distinction between the stupid and ignorant and those who *revel* in their stupidity and ignorance. For instance, the entire state of South Carolina.

    • Lynn
      July 9, 2011

      hahaha…i can’t say that i disagree with that last statement. Sure, i’m positive i could use an assistant. Let me just get the job details first. hahahaha

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