This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which it’s been 4 years

fireworks

So four years ago today I posted my first blog post. I’m actually in shock that I’m still writing this blog and in fact, I feel like I don’t have much to say and I’m constantly phoning it in.  I thought I’d share the first post below:

Ok. So I have been threatening to write a book for years and the only reason it isn’t written yet is the small fact “that I don’t write”. However, after spending the past week baking in the sun on The Outer Banks of North Carolina, I have been cajoled into starting the process by writing on a “blog”. I have since been informed that this LiveJournal thing is actually a blog and since about 10 of you have had the misfortune of friending me, you will be the guinea pigs for my new “creative process”

So… what is this book about. NOTHING. ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOTHING! You see …. That’s what my life is about. The book has a title “Good Enough – The Chronicles of an Underachiever”. After many, many beers a sequel title was proposed as well “The World is full of Assholes!” The book will be made up of the many (and I absolutely mean many) funny and ridiculous things that have happened to me in my life. (Trust me, weird things happen to me in my life). The book is about my philosophy of life which is about accomplishing nothing, being good at accomplishing nothing, and convincing other people who accomplish something … to simply stop it and also accomplish nothing. You see, most people are incapable of spending days at a time doing nothing … they get bored and start doing something … but that’s a story for another day.

I just wanted to declare my intention of overwhelming you guys with stupid stories. In return, I will religiously devote myself to reading as much fanfiction as is humanly possible. In fact, I already am!

We have also decided (my 20 year old daughter and I) to have a talk show. This came about from a hilarious conversation in which we were discussing our mani/pedi from the day before.

Keely: So my manicurist asked if I was okay and I said why wouldn’t I be. She replied that she had never heard a mother be so mean to her child before. I told her that’s how my mom was and it didn’t bother me.

Me: All I said was that my toes were much prettier than yours and how the hell do you manage to walk on such stubby toes?

Keely: Well, you also told me to stop being selfish by picking out my own nail color and to help you. When I didn’t, you made some random stranger help you.

Me: Isn’t that normal?

Well, at any rate we were laughing at the pool on how we could have a talk show and Keely would be “good cop” and I could be “bad cop”. I suggested that we have said talk show on Comedy Central when the lady near us stood up and said, “I would absolutely watch your talk show on Comedy Central. In fact, I’m really happy that I sat next to you guys today!” So, we have an idea and one viewer already. Any comments or suggestions?

 

Hahahaha…god it sucked.  So now I’m still writing the blog but my kids are gone and I’m traveling a bit more and trying to paint more and other stuff too.  So I don’t think I’m going to post 5 days a week; it’s just too much of a hassle and it’s become a bit of a chore.  I’m going to try at least 3 days/week but you guys need to be flexible (or don’t).

Anyways HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO ME!!! Hope that I keep it up another 4 years although I can’t even imagine.  Have a great day guys!!!

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6 Comments

  1. Cynthia K.
    August 15, 2014

    Happy anniversary! I found you through The Bloggess about two years and have been enjoying your chronicles over morning coffee ever since. Have a lovely day! I think your family should give you some kind of award.

    • Lynn
      August 15, 2014

      hahaha…my family HATES this blog (well not my husband) and they mostly ridicule me but I agree, they should give me an award

  2. Julie
    August 15, 2014

    Tell your kids to suck it. You blog is a kick and I look forward to it every morning. Cheers!

  3. Sheri
    August 15, 2014

    I’m really new to your blog, so I have a question..how’s the book coming? The blog seems to be doing just fine!

  4. Tammy Barker
    August 15, 2014

    Happy Anniversary! I think your blog is hilarious! Thanks for some laughs!

  5. Deb
    August 16, 2014

    Lynn, I found your blog somewhere about a year ago, probably reading someone else’s blog and there was a reference to you. I look forward to reading about you and your family everyday. You have me laughing out loud at some of the stuff that goes on in your house, some very similar to our house. Thanks for writing and I’ll keep on reading. Happy Anniversary!!!

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