This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which it’s spelled P*E*R*I*L

This conversation took place before I took Keely up to Washington but since I never shared it, I’m going to now.  Before she left, she had some odds and ends to wrap up and since I was attempting to get her to be more self-sufficient she’s been handling some stuff on her own.   Without further ado, here’s the conversation:


K:        Mom, you need to help me with some stuff.

Me:      Like what?

K?        Well, I need to call about some renters insurance.  I have this email.  Do you want to check it over?

Me:      Can’t you just read it to me?

K:        $72 for the summer, yada, yada, yada, … oh and it covers all Peril.

Me:      All Peril? What does that mean covers all Peril?

K:        You know, PERIL.  It’s Spelled P, E, R, I, L ….

Me:      (interrupting) Keely! I know what Peril is and how it’s spelled.  I mean, WHAT types of PERIL are they talking about?

K:        What?

Me:      Like tornadoes, hurricanes, floods, you know…what types of peril?

K:        I have no idea.

Me:      I can’t believe you were attempting to spell peril for me?

K:        Well …

Me:      What a funny way to describe insurance.  It’s like that time we were in Massachusetts and they said the area was “thickly settled” instead of “densely populated.”

K:        Oh yeah, that was hilarious.  People describe things in the weirdest ways.  Well I need to call them now.

Me:      Find out what types of “Peril” are covered too.

So Keely makes the phone call and then asks them SPECIFICALLY what type of “Peril” is covered.


K:        Ok Mom, here’s what Peril covers:  if lightening strikes the apartment and burns it down; if someone robs the entire place; if we leave the water on and flood the apartment; they never mentioned earthquakes and the like.

Me:      Ok Keely… thank you for helping me understand the Perils of living in an apartment.

K:        Oh and Mom?

Me:      What Keely?

K:        What’s a deductible?

Me:      Good grief…

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  1. Lisa
    July 27, 2011

    We don’t have renters insurance, but I’d love for them to cover our 1980s floor TV. It’s a classic.

  2. KLZ
    July 27, 2011

    Maybe if she spells deductible it will help you explain it.

  3. RCB
    July 27, 2011

    It could be worse, Lynn. You could be living in the Netherlands, the country where insurance equals art form and in nine out of ten cases it’s imposed by the government. Not exactly the land of the free…. I’m not gonna bother you with that, but let’s just say that the list of possibilities here never ends (insurance-wise) and it’s, of course, ridiculously expensive at that. That’s what I call P-E-R-I-L.

    – Thumbs up from across the Atlantic!

    P.S. You asked me what I taught and where. Well, don’t say it’s cracks you up, but I’m a sociolinguist who happens to be teaching English at Leiden University, near Amsterdam. Just for the record: I’m the only one who isn’t so damn boring! Say you believe me. Evidence: I’m the only one who writes about the art of sucking up (and my serious boss seriously hates it).

    • Lynn
      July 28, 2011

      I believe it…also, I don’t have great Internet access so I can’t always comment back here. Just a little FYI

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