This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!
Yesterday I had a very funny day. Well, the point of the day wasn’t very funny because I was actually going to a funeral a few hours away BUT the road trip itself was extremely funny and I am going to tell you about it. One of Keely’s best friends, whose mother is also a friend of mine, had her grandmother die. Well, SHE didn’t have her grandmother die but unfortunately, her grandmother did die. The funeral wasn’t in Greensboro but in a small town in eastern North Carolina called Dunn.
Now, I’ve never been to Dunn before. In fact, I don’t even think I’ve driven down that particular road before and I certainly haven’t been to that part of North Carolina. After all, it’s a fairly large state stretching from the mountains to the Outer Banks.
So we’re driving down to Dunn and the major players were Keely, her friend Lizzie (also Anne’s friend) and myself. I was driving. As we were continuing down the road we happened upon Sanford, North Carolina. I’ve never been to Sanford before but as we entered we glanced at the “welcome to Sanford” sign and underneath was the town slogan.
You know how you get to a city and they have a slogan? Like “The Big Apple” or the “city of brotherly love” or some other such thing? Well, the slogan on Sanford’s sign said “well-centered.”
Of course we cracked up. What kind of slogan is that? Well-centered?
Keely: Imagine this. Can you come up with a descriptive slogan?
Town of Sanford: how many words?
Keely: Just one
Town of Sanford: can it be hyphenated?
Keely: ummm…I suppose
Town of Sanford: how about “well-centered?”
I assume they meant that they were in the middle of the state but I was discussing it later with Tom (Anne’s father) and he said that the first time he saw the slogan he thought it meant that the people were “well-centered” like in they had it all together.
Here was our conversation:
Tom: I originally thought, “Wow, these people have it together. They’re well-centered!”
Me: That’s so funny. They would be better off saying “Sanford, we have our shit together”
Tom: hahaha … can you imagine?
Me: … or “Sanford, not even a little fucked up”
Tom: yeah, I’m not sure how that would look on a water tower
Me: the funny thing is that it was about being in the middle of the state, which is ridiculous
Merrill: (Anne’s sister) Why?
Me: because North Carolina has beautiful beaches and the Blue Ridge Parkway and basically being well-centered means that you’re in the middle of nowhere between them all
Tom: I never thought of it that way
So that was amusing. Another town we went through had a sign that said “Lillington heart of Hartnett” and all we could think of it “what the hell is Hartnett?” so I think North Carolina town’s have a little work to do with their town slogans.
It reminds me of the time we were driving though Massachusetts and we were between towns and there was a sign that said, “thickly settled” which was hilarious. Who describes people density that way? We laugh about that sign all the time and now, thanks to this road trip, we have something else to laugh about.
Just thought I’d share this little story with you. Don’t like it? Tough shit. Go read a different blog.