This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

In which THIS is typical



So this is typical:


Greetings from Las Ventanas al Paraíso!

We just received your “Guest Preference Form” completed for your stay at Las Ventanas al Paraíso from March 10-16, 2012, however, we realize that you are requesting dinner for the following nights:

Dinner at the Restaurante   March 16, 2012 @ 6.30 pm

Dinner at the Sea Grill   March 17, 2012 @ 7.00  pm

Could you please reconfirm you departure date or the dinner reservations?

Looking forward to your reply.

Best regards!

Martha ?  |  Reservations


Sometimes EVEN I am amazed at how I screw things up on a daily occurrence.


You would think that occasionally when I made a reservation or some such thing that I would turn out correct but that rarely seems to be the case.  In this case, I made the reservations for the week I would actually be back home rather than the week that I’m there.  No wonder Kevin is always ticked off at me.


At any rate, I wrote them back telling them that I actually meant the 10th and 11th.  Or was that the 11th and 12th?  At this point I have no idea.  Also, I hate making reservations in advance because you never know what kind of mood you’re going to be with.  Beyond that, Kevin and I tend to MEET people when we travel and sometimes we make plans with other couples.


So much thinking to do for what should be a pretty simple task.  I like going with the flow but unfortunately, the last time I tried that (In Jamaica) it turned out that all the reservations were already taken.  Of course, I straightened it all out because I promise you that there’s NOONE better at cleaning up messes than I am.


Probably because I’ve had sooooo much practice.


Why, just the other week when I was in Nashville Kevin called me on my cell and we had the following conversation:


Kevin:                      Lynn

Me:                            Kevin

Kevin:                      did you know we had NO HOMEOWNERS INSURANCE?

Me:                            what?

Kevin:                      NO HOMEOWNERS INSURANCE

Me:                            sure we do. I spoke to them this morning and it’s all-good

Kevin:                      well I just received a call and it’s NOT ALL GOOD

Me:                            are you sure?

Kevin:                      yes I’m sure Lynn! I just had to call an 800 number and straighten YOUR MESS OUT

Me:                            (see how it’s MY MESS?  I mean, it’s OUR house but MY MESS)  What? That can’t be right.  I just spoke to them.

Kevin:                      Damn it Lynn, can’t you do anything without screwing it up?


Well, I didn’t answer because I assumed this was a rhetorical question.  Also, I was in a nice restaurant and really; I shouldn’t be talking on the phone.


Later, when I got home I explained to Kevin that the whole thing was ridiculous and WHY did they involve him?  Apparently, when I paid the bill online I had a little typo with the numbers so I was $200 short and they STOPPED MY INSURANCE, which, by the way, I think, is bullshit.


Of course, I was laughing about it until Kevin pointed out to me that apparently we had a NATURAL GAS leak going on at the same time and IF the house had blown up we would have been uninsured.


Well, I suppose I learned my lesson, which is …


Wait! What’s the lesson again????




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  1. Wynona
    March 7, 2012

    So funny! You didn’t learn your lesson.. :D this really did happen because instead of hating yourself to all the stupidity you’ve made, you just laugh instead! Thanks for sharing this.. Great job!
    Wynona recently posted..How to unlock iPhone 3Gs the safest way?My Profile

    • Lynn
      March 7, 2012

      all this stuff is always true…perhaps i should take stuff more seriously though?

  2. By Word of Mouth Musings
    March 7, 2012

    That man just loves you SO much! :)
    By Word of Mouth Musings recently posted..Broken – Wordy Wordless WednesdayMy Profile

    • Lynn
      March 7, 2012

      yeah, he puts up with a LOT!!!!

  3. Jessie Powell
    March 7, 2012

    Oh man. Math with Jessie is always an adventure. The kids got, thank GOD my husband’s math mind. My Mom, who is the source of my struggles to do basic subtraction, is the only Mom at my niece’s school (my niece is her adopted daughter – long story about my evil sib there) who is willing to help with math, though, so she has earned the title of Math Assistant. When the going gets rough, she calls my husband. She has nicknamed him The Math Homework Helpline.

    • Lynn
      March 7, 2012

      well, i was a MATH major so that excuse doesn’t work around here…

  4. Kyla@Mommy's Weird
    March 7, 2012

    Sorry. Just laughing at your lesson.

    • Lynn
      March 7, 2012

      I’m here to amuse

  5. Julie
    March 7, 2012

    It drives The Mister INSANE that I don’t do a weekly grocery store haul. I stop on my way home from work and pick things up because, as you said, you never know what you’re going to be in the mood for. He claims I spend way more $$ that way but I tell him it’s cheaper than an attorney and divorce.

    • Lynn
      March 7, 2012

      Ni don’t either…I never can think in advance

  6. Rose37
    March 7, 2012

    Thanks for making my day laugh with this typical experience, hope to catch some more from it…
    Rose37 recently for sale in stroudMy Profile

    • Lynn
      March 7, 2012

      My pleasure

  7. Kelley
    March 7, 2012

    I’m laughing at his “Dammit, Lynn” comment because it sounds like something my husband would say, except not Lynn, because my name is Kelley. Not Lynn. Lynn is a pretty name, though. Lynn. Anyway, thanks for the laughs! You are not alone!

    • Lynn
      March 7, 2012

      Thanks for laughing along with me!!!

  8. Janie
    March 7, 2012

    Oh Lynn, he would hate the perfect wife — he deep inside knows he is lucky he got you — you allow him to believe he is smarter and superior

    I laugh out loud with you everyday — my health thanks you

    • Lynn
      March 7, 2012

      This comment makes me so happy

  9. Faith.The Blond.
    March 7, 2012

    Consider I am planning a 500 mile move to happen within the next 10-14 days..THIS is exactly how things have been going! Lemme tell ya….500 miles…in a vehicle…with 2 kids…2 fish..1 cat…..movers…hotels…resturants….new apartment….

    Lynn…how are you at fixing OTHER peoples’ mess ups? Cause I may need to call you, if for nothing else than to save my sanity!

  10. Christina
    March 14, 2012

    LOL you wouldn’t last 25 minutes with my husband! I love it! You guys are hilarious together!!! You DO need a sitcom!!!

    • Lynn
      March 14, 2012

      See?? Now you see what a miracle it is that we lasted 25 years. Loved, loved, loved meeting you guys and will DEFINITELY keep in touch!!

      Also…Kevin is a saint! And a patient man…

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