This blog is not for the light-hearted or easily offended. If either one of those descriptions applies to you, i would suggest you start drinking before you read this blog. A sense of humor is suggested. If you don't have one that sucks for you … find one and get a life!

Mom 2.0 Summit Wrap Up

LagunaMom 2.0 Summit Recap


Why is it called a summit?

Is it because it’s at the top of a cliff?

Perhaps it’s because if you walk down to the beach it’s like conquering Everest to get back up to the hotel.

Or it would have been if I hadn’t take the little cart

Cuz I was already huffing and puffing just getting off the beach


Oh yeah, the recap. ****** (I have forgotten to include Shelly Kramer, the most important person I have ever met.  I will devote the rest of my life to making it up to her.  Meanwhile, here’s her link!)


  1. Getting picked up at the airport and driven to the Ritz by one of readers/new friend Teresa Santoro was awesome cuz she gave me a personalized tour
  2. The Ritz was gorgeous
  3. My room was just a few miles from Mexico and was a billion miles from every single meeting…exercise complete.  Google maps ineffective in tracking down my room
  4. I waltzed up to my room and put in the key. No joy. Tried again. No joy. Wondered when I put up the do not disturb sign. Tried again. No joy. Looked at the room number. Whoops. Wrong floor, shit!!! Ran away…sorry person who didn’t wanna be disturbed
  5. Loved hearing Lisa Ling BUT: to the person who stood up in the question line and then talked about herself and handed Lisa king your magazine, you’re lucky I was lazy cuz I totally wanted to bitch slap you.
  6. To whomever thought of putting ring around the Rosie into play by having 19 tables of presentations every 15 minutes, please rethink this concept.  It was too loud to hear anything.
  7. Also, have you ever noticed that there’s always one person at every table who turns the entire conversation to “can we specifically discuss this as to how it relates to my blog?”
  8. Is narcissism a requirement? Just asked…I mean, it is all about me right?
  9. WTF HuffPost and Today Show? If I wanted to trek to the goddamn beach just to show you’re important enough to trek all the way to the beach I’d probably already be motivated enough to be successful without you.  Jeez, I’m looking for shortcuts, not workout activities,
  10.  Dear people who run the parties: I want beer! Not blue champagne, not Chardonnay, not a Cabernet. BEER! Is that so difficult???
  11. Also, why was everything fried? This wasn’t the south, it was southern California, where were the avocados?????
  12. The pool was lovely and the guac was great with the chips
  13. I met lots of articulate and bright peeps
  14. That’s why I love this conference for culling out the morons
  15. Except for the morons who were still there…thanks for realizing I’m not friendly and did t wanna talk to you
  16. I loved pitching to be on a talk show
  17. Raising America of course
  18. On HLN, with Kyra Phillips
  19. Ok, that’ll be a separate post
  20. You’re dying now aren’t you
  21. Too bad
  22. Great rule of thumb: talk to everyone because you never know when you’ll get a great connection for your kid
  23. People seem to remember my blog name better than I remember theirs…it leads to lots of awkward moments
  24. I seem to constantly meet people that I have apparently met before leading to still more awkward moments
  25. Traveling with Ann Zuraw is always fun because she is forever meeting people and then asking their life stories.  Then I have to stand around like an adult and listen….arrggghhhh
  26. If you are in a large room and your baby starts screaming and you cannot calm it down, please leave the room. Yeah I’m talking to you dad with the screaming baby during the ring around the rosy session in the main ballroom
  27. Two beers are better than one
  28. Three beers is even more preferable. Get the picture?
  29. When attending a “Kentucky derby party” do NOT wear a dress that looks like a bikini in the back unless you want everyone talking about you. Yeah, that happened.
  30. Do not assume that your taxi driver actually knows shit about the area he’s driving a taxi in.  He asked me to google where we were going? WAT????
  31. I had a grand time…met lots of fun peeps
  32. Pretty sure I won Miss Congeniality
  33. Still waiting for my sash and tiara
  34. I’m outta here

So there ya go! Next time you’re probably wanna go and hang with me.  That’s all I’m saying here!

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  1. Jester Queen
    May 6, 2013

    oh GOD – I think those ‘let’s make this whole roundtable about my blog’ people are a secret society who show up at every single conference out of spite.

  2. Shelly Kramer
    May 6, 2013

    Seriously? Thirty four fucking points and you don’t even mention me ONCE. Bitch please. Our friendship is ovah.

    • Lynn
      May 6, 2013

      I can’t believe i didn’t put you in there…my life is ruined

  3. Also you met this smart and hilarious girl named Jenny, but you can call her jennyitup if you want, and she wrote a post BEFORE the conference specifically addressing #5 so she would also like to be your back-up re: the bitch-slapping. And you can’t wait to go to a humor writer’s conference with her next year! What a recap post that will be…

    • Lynn
      May 6, 2013

      yeah i did, but then i figured i’d forget somebody and then i’d get all this bitching and moaning … see Shelly Kramer’s comment above

  4. Theresa
    May 6, 2013

    Thanks for the shout out!

    I feel bad about the 5cent tour, and the ditching you on the lunch, and overshooting the hotel by a mile, cause I was talking too much… but other than all of that…. It was a fun ride. I knew the taxi driver would have been confused…I should have offered round trip hotel/airport drop off. Such a straight shoot on the freeway! …. NEXT TIME!

    P.S. Raining today…so you missed that, which now makes the whole trip a success!

    • Lynn
      May 6, 2013

      really? People were jealous of my tour

      • Theresa
        May 6, 2013

        There is just so much more to the OC, then housewives with fake boobs, botox, and fake tans. My home county is a pretty cool place…so the tour will be longer next time. But I am glad you enjoyed a bit of the coast.

        • Lynn
          May 7, 2013

          sure has pretty sunsets … amazing … it was beautiful and you were fantastic

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